The Angry Old Man On the Next Bar Stool

Last weekend, Tina & I were hanging out by the pool with Toni & John (my sister-in-law/brother-in-law). After several hours of strenuous lounging, we naturally worked up an appetite. We finally settled on Chinese food. So, John & I assumed the role of hunter-gatherer and headed to one of the local Chinese carry-outs. There are so many Chinese carry-outs in Pasadena, I sometimes feel like I'm in Shanghai. But that's another story...

Anyway....

We head into the restaurant and place our order. Going against better judgement, I went with the General Tso's chicken. Of course, this decision literally burned me the next day. I know, too much information, so let us move on....

After being told that our food would take about twenty minutes to prepare, I came up with another bad idea when I suggested to John that we head over to a nearby bar to have a beer while we waited on our food. So, we crossed the street and walked into the dive.

The first thing that I noticed when we walked in was that everyone appeared to be shitfaced. Perhaps a bit odd at 5 o'clock on a Sunday afternoon, but who am I to judge? Well, we pull up the first two vacant bar stools in sight. I order a couple of draft beers. Of course, when I go into an unsophisticated bar, I like to order the most sophisticated beer in the house. I guess I'm a bit rebellious that way. So, I order a Heavy Seas Loose Cannon.

John and I clink our beer mugs and prepare to indulge in a 20-minute conversation while the lady across the street cooks up my General Tso's. Before we can even get a word out, the old guy sitting next to slaps me across the shoulder and says, "Aayy! You like football?"

Practically spitting out my beer, I respond, "Well, now that you mention it. Yes, I do like football."

Desperately hoping that this will be a brief encounter, the guy immediately follows up with, "Football's a pussy sport!"

"Um, ok," I reply.

Knowing that I'm probably in this for the long haul (or at least until the end of my Loose Cannon), I reluctantly ask, "So, what made you come to the conclusion that football is a pussy sport?"

He looks at me like I'm an idiot and slowly explains, "Because --- they're ----- a ---- bunch ----- of ----- pussies! That's why!!"

I guess, logically speaking, his explanation made sense. He then went on to tell me how rugby was the sport of real men. When I told him that rugby players were nuts, he stared at me like he was about to crack me upside the head with his beer mug. Assuming that he may have had a slight case of ADD, he quickly shifted to a new topic...politics. Oh joy...

He happened to overhear someone talking about former governor Willy Don Schaefer and this really set him off. He instinctively spewed out a profanity laced tirade about Schaeffer. He was so heated that he appeared to be shaking. I thought that he might be having a stroke. I tried to calm him down by putting my hand on his shoulder and saying, "Relax, the man is dead. He can't piss you off anymore." 

The guy stared right through me and I quickly took my hand off of his shoulder. Then he said, "You know what I would say to Governor 'Shit-fer' if he was standing right here?" 

Knowing that I was towing a dangerous line with this guy, I reluctantly said, "I have absolutely no idea. What would you say to him?"

The old man scrunches up his face and slowly lays his middle finger across his nose. Then, he says, "That's what I would tell 'em!"

He continued to hold his middle finger in the middle of his scrunched up face for an uncomfortable amount of time. I almost reached over and pulled his hand down. But, figuring that I might pull back a nub, I let it go.

Turning towards John, I started to say something, but was interrupted by another slap across the back from the old man. He apparently wanted to talk some more football as he asks, "Aaay! You want to me to tell you about real football team?"

I spontaneously replied, "Wait a minute. I thought football players were pussies?"

"No!", he says. "Not the Baltimore Colts."

Fully aware at this point that I was playing with fire, I diligently explained, "Umm, I don't know if you got the memo, but the Baltimore Colts left town about 30 years ago."

This brings a long 100-mile stare from the old man. For a second, I thought for sure that he was going to slug me. But instead, he brings his middle finger back up as he scrunched his face again. After about thirty seconds, through his clenched teeth, he says, "And you can thank Mayor Shit-fer for that!" (He said it in the same way in which Clint Eastwood uttered his famous "Go ahead, punk. Make my day.." line.)

A bit confused, I ask, "So, it's Mayor Schaefer's fault that the Colts left Baltimore?"

"You're damn right!", he confirms and predictably puts his middle finger up to his scrunched up face yet again. And then he went on to try to convince me that Baltimore had an NFL team prior to the Baltimore Colts. When I disagreed with him, he seemed to take offense that I had the nerve to question him. It was like I had just told him that his mother wore combat boots. At this point, it was quite obvious that there was more than one Loose Cannon at the bar.

Defying stupidity, I throw gas on the fire and ask, "Don't you think that Bob Irsay might have a little to do with the Colts leaving town?"

The guy starts to tremble and shake. Transitioning into his Dirty Harry persona one agin, he informs me, "He's a f*ckin' asshole!" Perhaps, most surprising was that he kept his middle finger in his holster this time...

As John finishes up the last of his beer, he finally rescues me and says, "Are you ready to get the hell out of here?"

I must mention that John is usually the one who winds up next to "the guy" when we go out. So, he thankfully acknowledged that I took the bullet today. We shook our heads as we walked across the street to pick up up our Chinese food. Freed at last.....

kw

The Redskins - One Step Closer To A New Name?

Earlier today, the Washington Redskins were stripped of their trademark registrations for their team name. This comes after an extended pissing contest between name-change advocates and the team's owner, Dan Snyder. When this issue surfaced in the past, Snyder vowed that he would never change the team name. However, with this latest strong-arm tactic by the Trademark Trial and Appeal Board, he might not have much of a choice.

This recent ruling is the result of a petition filed by five American Indians including Amanda Blackhorse, a Navajo activist. In Blackhorse vs, Pro-Football, Inc (the Washington Redskins legal name), the request was made to remove federal trademark protection from the Redskins on the grounds that the name is disparaging to American Indians. Today, a 2-1 ruling was delivered in favor of removing the trademark.

So, what does this now mean for Dan Snyder and his controversial team name? At the very least, it will create even more pressure for him to change the name. Advocates of the name change will certainly get a boost from today's ruling. And without the trademark protection, it will now be possible for anyone to use the team name and/or mascot without official permission or approval from the team.

But politics aside, is this really such a bad thing for Snyder? Think about it...Actually now, he's in a pretty good position. Although he previously vowed to never change the name, he can now legitimately claim that the government is forcing his hand and that he really has no choice. A change in team name and mascot will inevitably result in a dramatic increase in merchandise sales. As a result, Snyder can appease the race hustlers while saving face with the traditionalists. And as an added bonus, he will line his pockets with even more money. Cha-ching! Yeah, I think we see where this one is going.....

A bit of related trivia....The Redskins originated as the Boston Braves in 1932. When the team moved to Boston's Fenway Park the following year, the name was changed to the Redskins. In 1937, the Redskins moved to Washington.

Switching back to today's Board decision, I found it a bit odd that it was based a 2-1 vote. Two people can change 80 years of tradition by one simple vote? Why didn't they just flip a coin?

Aside from all of this, isn't it ironic that a person named Blackhorse is filing a claim against the Redskins for having a racially offensive name? I'll bet horses all over the world find her name highly offensive!

This latest story comes on the heels of infamous LA Clippers owner, Donald Sterling being stripped of his team due to racial remarks he made to his girlfriend. Whether through a private conversation or 80 years of tradition, anything that is deemed racist can have serious consequences for a sports team owner.

I'm not even a fan of the Washington Redskins, but I think this whole thing is a bunch of bullshit. The Redskins have been in existence since 1932 and now, all of a sudden, the name is offensive? Give me a break. What's next? Can we expect the Vatican to file a petition against the Saints?

While there are legitimate race issues worth fighting for, I don't think the Washington Redskins name is one of them. I see this as just another shakedown in the name of political correctness.....

kw

VMT - Maryland's Next Tax?

In a continued effort to tax anything under the sun, some Maryland lawmakers are now entertaining the thought of a "Vehicle Miles Traveled" tax. As if the gasoline taxes and rising toll fees weren't enough, Maryland drivers might soon be taxed on the actual mileage that they drive. Yeah, I know. I had the same reaction when I first heard about it...

In attempt to head off the potential VMT tax, last year, a group of Republican delegates sponsored a bill (HB277) to prohibit it. But, not surprising, that bill died in committee. You see, Republicans are the red-headed stepchildren in the blue state of Maryland.

For right now, the VMT tax is only in the discussion phase. But knowing that Maryland isn't above taxing anything, the odds of this eventually making it's way to the Governor's desk are pretty good. It seemed just like yesterday when Owe'Malley made Maryland the laughing stock of the country with the Rain Tax.....

Assuming that the VMT tax will eventually make it's way into the pockets of Maryland drivers, there is still the questions of how the actual mileage will be recorded and how the revenue will be collected. Will people be required to report their yearly mileage on their Maryland tax returns? If so, will be be on the "honor system" or will each vehicle be required to have it's odometer checked by a "revenue agent"?

There has also been some hinting about installing a GPS device in personal vehicles to record where you've driven. This, of course, opens up another can of worms regarding privacy concerns. Additionally, the GPS devices would be costly.

Oregon has already been leading the charge on the VMT tax. Next year, 5000 Oregon drivers will have mileage meters voluntarily installed in their vehicles. In lieu of paying a state gas tax, they will pay 1.5 cents for every mile they drive. So, for a person who drives 10,000 miles a year, he would owe the state $150. In Oregon, it might be a fair trade-off. But in Maryland, opponents of the VMT tax are convinced that Owe'Malley and company would implement it, not as an alternative to the gas tax, but as an additional tax.

It's almost like driving is viewed as a sin these days. To the tree-hugger, driving a Cadillac Escalade is the equivalent of clubbing a baby seal. So, I guess I shouldn't be surprised that a new "sin tax" is being proposed....

Here's a good one for you....one of the reasons given for implementing a potential VMT tax is that the revenue is declining for traditional gas taxes. And why is the revenue declining, you ask? Because of the increasing number of fuel efficient vehicles. That right, the same politicians who tried to guilt us into buying hybrids and other gas-friendly vehicles are now stabbing us in the back with a mileage tax.

Maryland drivers are currently taxed 27 cents on every gallon of gasoline. For those keeping score, the highest state gas tax is in California (46 cents/gallon) and the lowest is in Alaska (8 cents/gallon).

What makes the VMT or any tax for that matter so unpopular in Maryland, is that it never seems to end. Since Martin Owe'Malley moved to Annapolis, he has been hell-bent on taxing anything that moves.

Flash back a few years....... 

Owe'Malley gazes out of a State House window during a thunderstorm. As the lightning gives contrast to the pouring rain, Owe'Malley exclaims, "Hey, you know something? We should TAX that shit!" 

And the rest is history........

Driving in Maryland continues to get more expensive as a result of rising fuel prices, increased tolls and speed/red-light cameras. Could the "Vehicle Miles Traveled" tax be the next thing to take a bite out of Maryland commuters? If the people in Annapolis are talking about it, you can bet your ass that they'll try to make it a reality.....

kw

Manny's Weekend Meltdown

We learned earlier today that O's 3rd baseball Manny Machado has been suspended five games for his weekend antics against Oakland. Reading through the various online threads, there seems to be a lot of different opinions. Some think that five games is a bit harsh for tossing his bat across the infield. I have read comparisons to Boston's Davis Ortiz's meltdown last year in which "Big Pappi" demolished a dugout phone with his Louisville Slugger. Of course, Ortiz wasn't suspend at all for this temper tantrum.

So, in case you missed it, let me bring you up to speed on the Machado situation....

In Friday night's game against the A's, Baltimore had runners on first and second with one out. Machado happened to be the runner on second base. The batter (I can't remember who it was) hit a slow ground ball to the A's 3rd baseman, Josh Donaldson. Donaldson, realizing that he would not be able to turn a double play, decided to take the easy out and lead runner, Machado. Well, when Donaldson slapped the tag on Machado, the O's 3rd baseman was a bit off-balance and ultimately fell on his ass. Perhaps a little embarrassing. However, on his way down, Machado removed his helmet and threw it to the ground in the vicinity of Donaldson. Machado then got up and started mouthing off to Donaldson. This, of course, resulted in both teams' dugouts and bullpens coming onto the field. Things eventually settled done and the game resumed.

A short while later, Donaldson came to plate to face O's starter, Wei-Yin Chen. Chen, who hadn't hit a batter all year, proceeds to plunk Donaldson. Coincidence? Somehow, I doubt it.....

Then the drama continued on Saturday when Machado twice hit Oakland catcher, Derek Norris, with his backswing. So, in retaliation, on Sunday, A's reliever, Fernadno Abad, threw twice at Machado. On the second beanball, Machado flung his bat towards 3rd base. Another coincidence? Of course, the benches immediately cleared and the pushing and shoving commenced at home plate. In the end, Machado and Abad were ejected from the game.

So, is your head spinning yet? It kind of reminds me of the ol Abbott and Costello "Who's on first" routine. Anyway, here's my take on the whole situation.....

At the very least, Manny needs to get a hold of his temper. I thought the whole throwing of the helmet thing on Friday night was ridiculous. He looked liked a five-year-old having a temper tantrum. Honestly, I don't think Donaldson tagged him that hard. If Manny is going to upset over little stuff like this, he's going to have rough road in the major leagues.

And there are indeed times when your pitcher should stand up for you and do what needs to be done. There's an unwritten "baseball code" that permits the plucking of a batter when it's "necessary". But, in this case, I don't think Chen should have hit Donaldson.

Was Manny's backswing incident(s) on Saturday intentional? I'll bet the A's sure took it that way. So, as a result, Manny took a couple of tight pitches from Abad on Sunday. I wouldn't have had an issue if Manny would have went after Abad. But instead, he flung his bat towards 3rd base. I saw it as a passive-aggressive attempt to keep the drama going.

..............................................................................................................................

I am just trying to be objective here. Actually, I really like Machado. I think he's the best O's 3rd baseman since Brooks Robinson. His defense speaks for itself and his offense shows tons of potential. Watching him over the past two years has not only been a treat for me, but for all Oriole fans.

Yes, he had a bit of a meltdown over the past weekend. But everyone needs to remember that Manny is only 21 years old. As he matures, hopefully he'll learn to choose his battles more wisely. The next time he feels the urge to act out, maybe he should ask himself, "What would Brooks do...."

kw

The Baltimore Curfew

Aside from chasing down murderers, crack whores and drug dealers, Baltimore Police will soon be tasked with enforcing a youth curfew around the city. Starting in August, kids under the age of 14 will be required to be indoors by 9 pm each night. And 14-16 year-olds will be able to stay out until 10 on school nights and 11 on the weekends.

The curfew is supposed to help keep the kiddies safe in one of the country's most dangerous cities. There's obviously some truth to that claim. After all, stray bullets fly through the streets of Baltimore like mosquitoes on a stagnant mud puddle. If the kids are inside, there are less likely to have their life cut short by a drug deal gone bad.

On the other hand, these "innocent" kids are often the very ones responsible for wreaking havoc around the city. I have personally witnessed gangs of roving youths in the tourist areas of Baltimore. Although I didn't stop them for an interview, my gut feeling was that they were up to no good. We have also seen the videos of the "flash mobs" looting urban convenience stores. These mobs are mostly made up of teenagers. And has anyone ever experienced the dirt bike kids weaving in and out of traffic and doing wheelies down Pratt Street? Of course, the police are discouraged from chasing these inconsiderate assholes, so they continue to use the city as if it was their own personal "off-road" bike trail.

Let me cut right to the chase. The reason these kids are getting into mischief and running the streets of Baltimore at all hours of the night is because the parents are worthless. Because these so-called parents won't be responsible and actually parent, the job is now going to fall to the police and youth counselors. The City That Breeds continues to produce countless children who ultimately are raised, not by the mother and baby-daddy, but by the streets. Until the parents put down the crack pipe and start acting like responsible adults, this trend likely will continue.

So, how exactly will a curfew fix this? I honestly don't know. The parents will possibly face a $500 fine for their kid's curfew violations. Good luck trying to collect that money! Family counseling will also be offered for violators. Sorry for being skeptical, but I don't see a whole lot of positive outcome here either. If you haven't accepted the responsibility of parenthood by the time your kid is 14, I really don't think a few counseling sessions from Big Brother is going to change anything.

All this curfew will likely do is tie up city police, who are already short-staffed and over-worked. Will the police be expected to "card" every kid on the street after 10 pm? How many kids carry ID cards? More money, time and resources will be wasted for a program that will be almost impossible to enforce. But in yet another attempt to bullshit us into believing that steps are being taken to make the city safer, the curfew will go on.

And you know it's only a matter of time before a boatload of harassment charges are thrown at the police for trying to round up these juvenile delinquents. Instead of the parents putting a foot up the kids ass they'll blame the police for "pickin' on their babies". Remember the infamous skateboard incident at the Inner Harbor a few years ago? This curfew will undoubtedly set the cops up for a no-win situation.

Politicians are always telling us that "it's all about the kids". In this case, it's all about the parents......

kw

The Controversial Trade

A few days ago, we learned that US Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdhal was released after five years of captivity in Afghanistan by an al-Qaeda related insurgent group. On the surface, it seemed like a good thing. After all, what American couldn't be happy about an America POW finally coming home?

But as the story continues to unfold, the controversy continues to grow......

First off, the way the release was orchestrated has many Americans scratching their heads. In exchange for Bergdhal, President Obama agreed to free five Guantanamo Bay detainees. And these were not Kumbaya-singing choirboys. These were five dangerous Taliban leaders who are now free to resume their terrorist activities. Many critics of this "hostage swap" have serious concerns about the message that this sends to the rest of the world. It also seems to go against conventional wisdom to release terrorists while we're still fighting a war against them.

Secondly, there is the issue of whether or not Obama's decision to trade the Islamist terrorists for Sgt. Bergdhal was even legal. According to what we've been told, the President must give Congress 30 days notice prior to releasing any prisoners from Guantanamo Bay. From everything that's been reported, the 30-day notice was not given. There are some who are already suggesting that Obama could be impeached over this. According to an article from "The Hill" today, the White House has defended the action as an "oversight".

The law that was allegedly broken was part of the National Defense Authorization Act. In an ironic twist, the NDAA was signed into law last year by none other than Obama himself.

As if this wasn't enough, we are now being told that Bergdhal may have actually been a deserter who abandoned his command post in June 2009 which led to him being held captive. In the subsequent manhunt for Bergdhal, at least six American soldiers were reportedly killed. There is also talk about how Bergdhal was disillusioned with the Army and that he wanted to renounce his American citizenship prior to his capture. Allegedly, he has also made anti-American statements.

There is now talk about Bergdhal possibly being court martialed over this. If this were to happen, he could wind up back in captivity, only this time in an American prison.

Adding to the controversy, Bergdhal's father, who appears to be a Muslim, is said to have tweeted that "he is working to free all Guantanamo prisoners". If this is true, I'd sure like to hear him explain exactly what's involved in his "work".

We'll learn more about these things as the story unfolds, but this is certainly not going to fare well for the President if any or all of this turns out to be true. I guess the good news for him is..... at least the V.A. scandal is no longer dominating the headlines.

kw