For the past month or so, every time Oriole relief pitcher Pedro Strop takes the mound, he usually creates a whirlwind of expletives from O's fans. He has become infamous around Baltimore for his silly looking crooked hat as well as blowing leads late in the game. I was watching the O's game in a local bar a few weeks ago when Strop was called in from the bullpen. And even though he hadn't even thrown the first pitch, the bar patrons were calling him every thing from asshole to the Anti-Christ. A few minutes later, when he predictably blew the lead, the bar erupted into chaos. One guy looked like he was about to throw his beer mug at the large screen TV. Oh wait a minute, that was actually me....
So, while sitting around the fire smoking cigars last night at my friend Kevin's house, he came up with an idea. He said we should come up with a new term: Stropin'. I think he might be onto something here. After having some time to think about it, I've come up with some ideas on how we can use the new word. Below, I've listed a situation and followed it by the appropriate use of our new "S" word:
After Pedro and his crooked hat blow the next O's lead........"Well, he really Stropped that up!"
If the game is totally out of reach...."Strop it. Let's get out of here!"
The next time you buy a beer at Camden Yard......"$9 for one Stroppin' beer? That's Stroppin' ridiculous!"
When Yankee or Red Sox fans gives you a hard time....... "Go Strop yourself!"
When rain threatens to disrupt the game......"Look at that Stroppin' sky. I think it might rain."
When Manny Machado makes a great play at 3rd base......."That kid can Stroppin' play!"
When Chris Davis hits his next bomb......."That Stroppin' guy is a beast!"
When the umpire blows a call...."Stevie Stropin' Wonder could have made a better call than that!"
When you see the Oriole bird dancing atop the O's dugout on a 95-degree day..."The poor guy in that costume must be sweating his Stropin' ass off!"
When the guy sitting in front of you stands up and blocks your view...."Sit the Strop down!"
If he happens to turn around say something....."Shut the Strop up!"
Of course, the use of our new word isn't limited to the baseball game. You can use it almost anywhere. Take rap "music" for example. The average rap song drops more f-bombs than a Good Fellas film festival. So, to make things a little more family-friendly, rappers could do something like this:
Driving down da road in my Escalade,
I don't give a Strop 'cause I got it made.
Crazy mutha-Stoper gettin' up in my grill,
I slap his Stropin' ass and commence to chill.
Go motha-Stroper! Go mutha-Stroper! Go!
(I don't know about you, but I smell a top-10 hit in those lyrics....)
Moving on...... the next time someone lies to you, look them in the eyes and say, "This is Stroppin' bullshit!"
If you're sitting on you back porch reading a book and a strange-looking bug lands on you, say, "Whoa! What the Strop is that?!"
When someone gives you a hard-luck story, you can console them by saying, "Damn, dude, That's pretty Stroped up!"
In perhaps it's most simple form, the word can be used to voice total displeasure or frustration. For instance, the next time you drive over the Bay Bridge and realize that the tool has increased to $6, you might want to yell, "Strop!"
And feel free to use it with traditional terms of endearment like "Strop you and the horse you came in on!"
So, the next time you feel the urge to drop a traditional f-bomb, try substituting our new word. If this new vocabulary campaign takes off, I'm thinking about getting t-shirts and bumper stickers printed up!
kw
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