Back in the Day - The Clothes

Every generation goes through various fashion trends. And inevitably, those things that you now think are so cool will become outdated and unfashionable...

Back in my day, the guys had it pretty easy. A few pair of Levi's blue jeans and a various array of T-shirts would round out about half of the male wardrobes. The T-shirts usually displayed a popular rock band or beer logo. A lone collared "golf-shirt" might be found in the back of a closet for that special occasion.

The classic rock look of the 70's eventually gave up some fashion leverage to the New Wave movement. This ushered in the preppy look of pop-top collars and pleated khakis. I guess this was about the time we were introduced "parachute pants". I never quite understood these. Were they actually made of parachutes? I don't know. They were essentially made of some kind of plastic/nylon material. In the summer, they acted as a sauna for your lower extremities. In the winter, they offered only an ultra-thin barrier between your legs and the outdoor elements. But amazingly, someone probably got very rich by marketing these things to the teen masses of the early 80's. Maybe it was the same guy who brought us the Pet Rock, who knows?

The 80's also ushered in the era of designer jeans. Calvin Klein, Gloria Vanderbilt, and of course, Jordache found their way into the department stores where teenage girls eagerly lined up to buy them. Some of the guys bought them as well. I remember one of my good friends showing up for a pick-up football game wearing a pair of these things. I can't remember the exact brand name but they had this bold, decorative stitching design on both of the back pockets. My first reaction was, "You gotta be kidding me. Who the hell plays football in designer jeans?" But he insisted on joining the rest of us who were decked out in generic sweatpants. Every time the guy went up for a pass, I was waiting for the fashion paparazzi to jump out from behind a tree to capture the moment. 

And unlike the loose, saggy jeans of today, the jeans of my generation had to be worn skin tight. I can't imagine how many young men experienced sterility issues due to this. And the girls faced their own issues simply getting into their jeans. My pliers were always absent from my toolbox because my sisters would steal them. Why? Because their jeans were so tight, they couldn't zip them up the conventional way. So, they had to lay flat on their beds and use to the pliers to pull up on the zipper. Most of the girls from the 80's looked like they were poured into their jeans.

Somewhere around this time, the ripped jeans made their way \onto the scene. I remember seeing rock bands wearing them. The late, great Eddie Van Halen comes to mind. Before long, these methodically torn garments were readily available in all of the clothing stores. I never bought a pair of these. I always thought it was ridiculous to pay for a pair of jeans that were defective right off of the shelf. But amazingly, these things are still popular today.

I also remember seeing these oversized "balloon" pants. I don't even remember the name of them. A lot of the muscle-bound gym guys would wear them. They were often designed with zig-zag patterns and weird colors. A pair of gigantic clown shoes would have been the perfect accessory. They were absolutely ridiculous looking. Of course, I would never say this back then. Getting your ass kicked is bad enough. But getting your ass kicked by a guy in multi-colored balloon pants is too much for anyone to absorb. These pants were emphasized to nth-degree when MC Hammer hit the scene with his "Can't Touch This" video.

I believe it was also the 80's that introduced us to "leg warmers". Another item that I never quite understood. A leg warmer was basically a giant sock that covered a woman's lower leg. I'm not sure if their calves really needed an extra layer of warmth. But I guess you can never be too prepared.

For a brief period, neon-colored clothing became a trend. Although the colors were unflattering, they definitely made you stand out in a crowd. If you were going for the "late night road crew" look, this would do it for you.

Through it all, I've pretty much remained a traditionalist. Although the size has increased over the years, I still wear the standard Levi's jeans and assorted t-shirts. Fashion trends come and go but the basics never seem to go out of style.....

kw