While I was in San Jose a couple of weeks ago, I was introduced to some new foods. There's a heavy Asian population in the San Jose/San Francisco area, so it stands to reason that there's no shortage of Chinese, Korean and Vietnamese cuisine. If you went into shopping center where there were ten restaurants. seven or eight of them would specialize in some sort of Asian fare.
One of the more interesting places was called Pho Tau Bay. As my friends led me into the restaurant, I half expected to see a tropical themed place similar to Cheeseburger In Paradise. However, this place was quite the contrary. Methodically lined in neat rows, uneventful tables filled the dining area. As we sat down, my friends, who were much more versed in this type of cuisine, informed my that we were about to dine on pho (pronounced "fah"). As long as it wasn't fish eyeballs or bull testicles, I was game for almost anything. (Of course, the four Anchor Steam lager's that I had prior to dinner had lowered any inhibitions that I might have had.)
We look over the menu and we all settle on the house specialty. It consists of a bowl of thin noodles in a beef broth with a variety of "fixins" on the side. The dish also comes with thinly sliced pieces of filet mignon. We have the choice of a regular size bowl or a large one. Although we're not in Texas, we take "bigger is better" approach and order the large version. After all, it was only $10. How big could it be?
They must have had this stuff already prepared because within a few minutes, the waiter was already walking towards us with two large bowls. Actually large is an understatement. You could have bathed in these things. When the guy put the bowls down on the table, my firs thought was that these were community bowls and that we would somehow split the contents between the six us us. But before I wrapped my head around it, the waiter retreats and then returns with a couple more bowls. And after that, he brought numbers five and six. And after that, he started to bring out the various garnishments. And then lastly, out came the individual portions of raw steak.
Now, I've eaten sushi before but I had never eaten raw beef. And frankly, even with the liquid courage flowing through my blood-steam, I wasn't thrilled about it. I never had to worry about this kind of thing at the Outback. As I stared at the red meat on the plate in fornt of me, I mentally prepared for the inevitable.
Thankfully, one of my friends informed my that you put the meat in the hot broth to cook it. I am so glad these guys were there. Otherwise, I would have been gnawing on the raw meat like a vulture on a piece of roadkill.
So, I pick up a piece of the blood soaked steak and drop it into the soup. I was pleasantly surprised to see that the cooking process was actually happening. So, I proceeded to dump the rest of the meat into the bowl.
When I was confident that the meat wasn't going to "moo" at me, I prepared to dine. But there's was one problem...I had no silverware. I announced that I was going to grab the waiter to secure a fork and spoon. But one of my buds quickly informed that this was an authentic Vietnamese diner and that the "silverware" was right in front of me. All I saw was a pair of chopsticks. I impulsively responded, "You're kidding, right?"
I can understand trying to a solid piece of food with chopsticks. But how in the hell do you eat soup with them? It's liquid!
Nonetheless, when in Rome.......
So, I fumbled with the chopsticks and fished out whatever piece of noodle or steak I could grab. After a little practice, I was pulling stuff out of the cavernous bowl like a pro. I looked like one of the Deadliest Catch guys pulling a King Crab out of the Bering Sea. The flavor of the combination of beef, broth and the thin noodles was incredible.
The problem was that we were no match for the gigantic portions. So, most of us left at least half a bowl behind. I didn't want to insult the staff so I told the waiter how great it was. He just looked at me with a blank face. In his defense, I don't think he (or any of the staff) spoke a word of English. But that's part of the authentic experience, right?
All in all, an interesting experience that will likely result in a return visit.....
kw
Wednesday, November 23, 2016
Strangers On A Plane
Air travel has it's conveniences. Instead of spending 18 hours in a car of screaming kids, you can load up the family in a 737 and get started on that Disney vacation in a couple of hours. However, flying the friendly skies can also have it's inconveniences.. On a recent flight to San Diego, I had a front row seat to one of them.....
On Southwest airlines, there's always a jostling of the seats. Because of their open seating policy, the first two-thirds of the passengers will hustle to secure those coveted window and aisle seats. They eventually give way to the final (aka the "C Group") who inevitably board the plane with a look of utter despair in their eyes. On a recent flight, I sat in my aisle seat (secured by a bargain price of $15 via an Early Bird check-in) and watched the crowd look to and fro in hopes of spotting a window seat that has somehow flown under the radar. Unfortunately, these hopes almost always lead to disappointment.
As the crowd moves in, a woman in the back of the plane decides that she wants to take a seat near the front of the plane. I guess it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind? Nonetheless, her attempt to move to her new seat is headed off by the disgruntled C-group. Keep in mind, the aisle on his plane is very narrow. Unless you're a super-model with an eating disorder, you're probably not going to make it down the aisle too easily. So, squeezing past another full size adult is virtually impossible. But the woman is determined. She desperately tries to squeeze by an oncoming man but it's quite obvious that it ain't happening. The man, already pissed because of the middle seat that awaits him, asks the woman, "Where the hell are you trying to go??"
The woman points to a seat about ten rows behind him towards the front of the plane. The guy rolls his eyes and then turns sideways and presses his pelvis into the head of sleeping passenger in the aisle seat in front of me. The woman turns sideways in the opposite direction and attempts to squeeze past the guy. With her ass firmly wedged up against the man's ass, the woman wiggles in a futile attempt to make it past him. Keep in mind, the woman had one of those large Kim-Kardishain type asses.
Meanwhile, after practically being sexually assaulted by repeated pelvic thrusts, the sleeping passenger inevitably wakes up. That last thrust to the head must have been too much to absorb. Looking as if he just took an overhand right from Mike Tyson, the guy sits in his seat and shakes out the cobwebs. I heard him mumble a subtle "WTF" as he rubbed his eyes and tried to figure out what just happened.
The whole scene was like watching an old episode of Seinfeld. And although I was genuinely enjoying the pre-departure comedy show, I was starting to worry that it would delay our flight. The man finally puts an end to the nonsense and says to the woman, "Look, this isn't going to work. You need to let me get by so I can get to my seat for Christ's sake!"
Instead of simply turning around and walking to the back of the plane, the woman tries to squeeze into the aisle seat directly across from me. The problem here was that there was a person sitting in the seat. But again, the woman was determined and would not be deterred. The seated passenger leaned into the the person on the middle seat in order to give Miss Inconsiderate a little space. She stayed in this position until the rest of the C-group boarded. The poor passenger would probably need a chiropractor after staying that cramped position for so long. I'm not a violent person but I would have probably throat-punched the woman if she infringed on my space like that.
Eventually, all of the C-group boarded the plane and the woman was finally able to move freely through the aisle. After all of the hassle and inconvenience, she finally settles into a middle seat next to a guy who I assumed to be her husband. All of this effort for a middle seat....are you kidding me?
After what seemed like a brief eternity, the plane finally entered the sky. And can you guess who the first person who needed to get up an use the bathroom? Yep, we were barely in the air for 15 minutes and the woman was walking into the on-coming direction of an approaching flight attendant. The flight attendant gave a subtle roll of her eyes and a forced smile as the woman squeezed past her....
kw
On Southwest airlines, there's always a jostling of the seats. Because of their open seating policy, the first two-thirds of the passengers will hustle to secure those coveted window and aisle seats. They eventually give way to the final (aka the "C Group") who inevitably board the plane with a look of utter despair in their eyes. On a recent flight, I sat in my aisle seat (secured by a bargain price of $15 via an Early Bird check-in) and watched the crowd look to and fro in hopes of spotting a window seat that has somehow flown under the radar. Unfortunately, these hopes almost always lead to disappointment.
As the crowd moves in, a woman in the back of the plane decides that she wants to take a seat near the front of the plane. I guess it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind? Nonetheless, her attempt to move to her new seat is headed off by the disgruntled C-group. Keep in mind, the aisle on his plane is very narrow. Unless you're a super-model with an eating disorder, you're probably not going to make it down the aisle too easily. So, squeezing past another full size adult is virtually impossible. But the woman is determined. She desperately tries to squeeze by an oncoming man but it's quite obvious that it ain't happening. The man, already pissed because of the middle seat that awaits him, asks the woman, "Where the hell are you trying to go??"
The woman points to a seat about ten rows behind him towards the front of the plane. The guy rolls his eyes and then turns sideways and presses his pelvis into the head of sleeping passenger in the aisle seat in front of me. The woman turns sideways in the opposite direction and attempts to squeeze past the guy. With her ass firmly wedged up against the man's ass, the woman wiggles in a futile attempt to make it past him. Keep in mind, the woman had one of those large Kim-Kardishain type asses.
Meanwhile, after practically being sexually assaulted by repeated pelvic thrusts, the sleeping passenger inevitably wakes up. That last thrust to the head must have been too much to absorb. Looking as if he just took an overhand right from Mike Tyson, the guy sits in his seat and shakes out the cobwebs. I heard him mumble a subtle "WTF" as he rubbed his eyes and tried to figure out what just happened.
The whole scene was like watching an old episode of Seinfeld. And although I was genuinely enjoying the pre-departure comedy show, I was starting to worry that it would delay our flight. The man finally puts an end to the nonsense and says to the woman, "Look, this isn't going to work. You need to let me get by so I can get to my seat for Christ's sake!"
Instead of simply turning around and walking to the back of the plane, the woman tries to squeeze into the aisle seat directly across from me. The problem here was that there was a person sitting in the seat. But again, the woman was determined and would not be deterred. The seated passenger leaned into the the person on the middle seat in order to give Miss Inconsiderate a little space. She stayed in this position until the rest of the C-group boarded. The poor passenger would probably need a chiropractor after staying that cramped position for so long. I'm not a violent person but I would have probably throat-punched the woman if she infringed on my space like that.
Eventually, all of the C-group boarded the plane and the woman was finally able to move freely through the aisle. After all of the hassle and inconvenience, she finally settles into a middle seat next to a guy who I assumed to be her husband. All of this effort for a middle seat....are you kidding me?
After what seemed like a brief eternity, the plane finally entered the sky. And can you guess who the first person who needed to get up an use the bathroom? Yep, we were barely in the air for 15 minutes and the woman was walking into the on-coming direction of an approaching flight attendant. The flight attendant gave a subtle roll of her eyes and a forced smile as the woman squeezed past her....
kw
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