Scooters Gone Wild

I'm not sure when it started, but it seems like every time I go into a shopping center these days, I have to dodge an out-of-control scooter. It's like the people "driving" the scooters are oblivious to any other person within a hundred yards. Just the other day, I was in a local BJ's Wholesale Club. I'm thumbing through a book near the middle of the store when an old woman crashes into the back of my leg with her scooter. It didn't really hurt but it definitely got my attention. The funny thing is, the woman looks at me and asks, "Oh, did I run into you?" Did  she really have to ask? And from the way she phrased the question, I could tell that I wasn't her first victim.

Later, in the same BJ's store, I saw a scooter that appeared to have run "out of gas". It was a strange sight to see two guys pushing the thing through the store with a large woman on board.

And about a month ago, I was in a Walmart where two guys nearly came to fisticuffs over the last remaining scooter near the store's entrance. As they got louder and louder, they naturally started to draw attention from the other Wal-Martians. Oddly enough, no one from the Walmart staff felt the need to intervene. The argument eventually ended when one guy told the other one that he could "shove the scooter up his ass". By the way, this happened to be the same Walmart where the infamous bleach fight happened.

I have also been in grocery stores where I'll turn into an aisle only to be met by two or three scooters coming straight towards me. And I can't even pass them as they block up the whole aisle. So, I have to backtrack and try to find a scooter-less path.

I don't have so much of an issue when handicapped or elderly people use the scooters. But I have a strong suspicion that many people are jumping on these things because they're just too lazy to walk. I'm sorry, but just because you're overweight doesn't automatically make you handicapped. Instead of riding that scooter down the Tastykake aisle, do yourself a favor and walk for those Krimpets. It might actually do you some good. Hell, it will probably do me some good too as they will be one less scooter to run into me!

kw