Christmas Thorns

Even though it can be stressful, I try my best to stay in festive mood in the weeks leading up to Christmas.But every year, there are certain things that really test my patience. So, without further ado, here are the things that  pushed my buttons this year:

• Public Schools - For referring to the down-time between Christmas and New Years as a "Winter Holiday". Why don't these politically correct cowards tell us exactly what traditional "holiday" we're actually celebrating this "winter"?

• Honda - Although I think they make a great automobile, the song in their latest commercial drives me nuts. You know, the one that goes "Holiday oh Holiday, it's the best time of the year...." Every time I hear it, I feel like throwing something at my TV.

• Christmas Thieves - Christmas is supposed to be a time of expressing goodwill toward your fellow man. It really bothers me when I hear of thefts from charitable organizations like Toy For Tots. Stealing Christmas gifts, especially from children, is about as low as you can go.

• The NFL - For playing football on Christmas Day. Yes, the Cowboys and Cardinals will be playing this Christmas.I love football, but it pales in comparison to spending quality time with your family. Football will be here forever. Your family and friends won't. 

• Politically Correct Companies - For having "Holiday Parties". Again, what holiday is it that we're celebrating??

• The ACLU - For asking us to be tolerant of "other" religions and then telling us that we can't say the word "Christmas" because it's offensive to some people. The ACLU can kiss my Christmas celebrating ass! Is that offensive enough for you??

• Snow - Sorry folks, I'm just a not big fan of the white stuff. Sure, it looks beautiful on a postcard and everyone dreams of a White Christmas, but in reality, it always turns into a slushy mess. Plus, I can't get too thrilled about anything that's going to eventually force me to pick up a shovel.

• Christmas Tree Vendors - I hate when the tree lots display a huge sign that says "Any Tree On Lot $30". Then below it, in really tiny, barely legible letters, it says "Except Firs". Aren't firs the most popular variety of  Christmas Trees? Of course, they are. 

• Lame Looking Santa Claus' - I recently saw a mall Santa who was so skinny he looked like a red and white Q-Tip. I'll bet the guy used ChapStick as deodorant. Hey, I thought Santa Claus was supposed to be plump. 

• Retailers - Why don't stores offer those "blow-out" Christmas deals year round? Maybe we would shop there more often if they did. Just a thought....

• Overzealous Pet Owners - For the love of God people, please don't dress your dog or cat up as a reindeer. You gotta ask yourself, how would you like it?

• Chick-fil-A - I actually surprised myself with this one. After all, Chick-fil-A is, without a doubt, my favorite fast food restaurant. However, every year, they tease me for a couple of months with a Peppermint Chocolate Chip milkshake. Then, right after the holidays, they take it away. It's cruel....

All right, I think that's about enough complaining for now. After all, I wouldn't want to ruin my jolly mood. Damn, it's snowing again!

KW