And you ever notice that whenever it snows, it's considered "breaking news" every ten minutes? The weather man could sum things up by saying something like, "Ok, folks, the total accumulation is 6 inches. It's going to be a bit slippery out there today. Be sure to shovel off your walkways. And most importantly, don't be an asshole and be sure to brush the snow off the top of your vehicle. Ok, back to the studio......."
Now, there are indeed legitimate breaking news stories. For example, I personally consider it breaking news when:
- O's pitcher Wei-Yin Chen makes it past the third inning
- you travel 5 consecutive miles in Maryland without passing a toll, speed camera or red-light camera
- no one gets murdered in Baltimore within a 24-hour period
- there's a sober suspect on an episode of Cops
- I go into Subway and don't have to say, "I'm sorry, I can't understand what you're saying. Can you repeat that?"
- a politician tells us the truth
- you see anyone above the age of six without a cell phone
- I don't receive a parking citation within two minutes of my meter running out
- I log into Facebook and don't see anyone posting about their gym workout
- I make it out of Walmart without saying "WTF"
- the Ravens go a full week without a player being arrested
- a full day goes by and Martin Owe'Malley doesn't create a new tax
- I see someone in Baltimore City with a dog other than a pit bull
- I deliver three consecutive sentences without dropping the f-bomb
So, what exactly do you consider breaking news??
kw
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