Tuesday, July 1, 2014

The Adventurous Toys of Yesterday

The other day day I was talking to a friend about some of the crazy things we used to do as kids. Although a little dangerous at times, we all lived to tell about our adventures. Not surprising, Band-Aids and tetanus shots were a big part of our youth.

Of course, some of the routine toys of my generation would be frowned upon today. For instance, most of the playgrounds back in the day were made of shiny sheet metal. Not only did it practically blind you when the sun hit it, but it could also get hotter than hell on a summer day. If this wasn't enough, in order for you to even take a slide down the towering inferno, you first had to climb up a 20-foot ladder! Most of today's kids would probably gas out halfway up.

Back in the day, we would often improvise and use natural "toys". As hard as it might be for today's kids to comprehend, we would often climb trees just for the hell of it. It took effort and a considerable amount of agility to get to the highest part of the tree. But when you got there, you felt like you had reached the top of Mt. Everest. It gave you a sense of accomplishment.

Another beloved toy of my youth was the BB gun. You are probably familiar with little Ralphie's determined quest for the Red Ryder BB gun in "A Christmas Story". I know this is hard to digest in today's pussified society, but there was a time where the BB gun was almost as much a rite of passage for a young boy as baseball. Of course, not nearly as many kids play baseball these days either...

The predecessor to the BB gun was the cap gun. This was usually a small plastic or metal toy-gun that "fired" caps. Caps were small red rolls of paper with small pockets of gunpowder. Yes, gunpowder! When we got a little older, we traded the gun in for a hammer. You see, when you took a whole roll of caps and hit it with a hammer, it made a thunderous blast! At least it seemed thunderous back then...

Hey, does anyone remember Shrinky-Dinks? No, guys, I'm not talking about when you jumped into a cold pool. Shrinky-Dinks were these thin plastic sheets on which you would creatively draw a colorful picture. After performing your best artwork, you would place the plastic sheet into a hot oven. As you eagerly looked through the over window and breathed in the toxic fumes, the plastic would shrink to a fraction of it's size. It would become a thick, hard piece of artwork in which you could transform into a necklace, hang from a Christmas tree or throw at a passing car.

Then there were the Clackers. These were two golfball-sized marbles that were attached by a string. You would jerk the string up and down to make the two marbles smack against one another. Most of us wound up cracking the marbles off of various body parts. Along the same lines, there was the paddle and ball game that we usually received as a "prize" at carnivals and birthday parties. The toy consisted of a wooden paddle attached to a small rubber ball by a long rubber band. You would hit the ball with the paddle and the rubber band would propel it back at you. You had to have pretty good reflexes to bat the ball more than two or three consecutive times. I can remember seeing stars a few times after taking a ball in the eye.

Perhaps the most beloved yet dangerous toy of my youth was the game of Lawn Darts. These were large darts with heavy, pointy ends. The object was to toss the dart into a 2-foot ring a short distance away. Basically, it was a variation of horseshoes. Because of multiple episodes of people getting speared by the darts, the were banned in 1988. Although they show signs of wear, I still have two sets of Lawn Darts. Once in a blue moon, I'll break them out at a cook out. Although they can certainly be dangerous if you're not paying attention, it's actually a fun game.

Sure, these things could be hazardous at times. But I still think it beats spending all day in front of a TV playing video games...

kw

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