Tough Times For Sears & Kmart

I recently read that over 100 Sears and Kmart stores will be closed in the near future. From what I understand, the closings are being blamed on lower than expected holiday sales. But I suspect that things go deeper than that...

First off, let me say that I have shopped at Sears forever (and still do). As a kid, I can remember waiting for the arrival of the Sears Christmas catalog (a.k.a. The Wishbook). The toy section was most impressive and I would spend hours flipping through it. So many choices......

As an adult, I have bought countless pairs of Levi jeans and Docker's from Sears. The prices are comparable to other major retailers and I always liked the "shopper-friendly" organization of Sears clothing section. Knowing my exact size, I could usually just grab a pair of jeans out of the neatly labeled wall-rack and be on my way. (Lately, this has become more of a challenge due to the redistribution of weight to certain parts of my body!)

And of course, being a guy, Craftsman tools were always a big attraction for me. The quality and "craftsmanship" spoke for itself. I also liked that Sears gave a lifetime guarantee on most of their hand tools. I used to love talking to some of the older sales guys in the tools department. They were knowledgeable and could often give you good advice on which tool was best for your specific need. But disappointingly, on my most recent trips to Sears, I have seen these positions filled with young inexperienced kids who really show no interest in their job. Could this have something to do with the diminishing sales? I would think so....

Another recent disappointment is the Sears automotive department. It used to be my "go-to" store for tires and minor repairs. The products were solid and the service was quick and efficient. However, in recent years, the Sears auto department has proven to be severely understaffed. I even had one employee give me the low-down on how thin the crew was being stretched. When the staff starts bitching to customers, you know Houston definitely has a problem. Unfortunately, in today's world of "profits over people", this scenario has become the norm rather than the exception....

Moving over to Kmart......

I was really surprised when I learned that Kmart was buying Sears (and not the other way around) several years ago. Sears always seemed so much bigger than Kmart. Seriously, have you ever heard of the Kmart Tower?

Frankly, I have never been a big fan of Kmart. Although the prices were always reasonable, I just found many of the the stores to be outdated and unorganized. At my local Kmart, it was very common to see storage bins (and sometimes pallets) scattered through the aisles. They shelves were often in disarray which created a challenge when trying to find your item. Because of this, I would often opt for the nearby Target where things always tended to be neat and tidy.

Wal-Mart was another alternative but it tended to be much more crowded. (Hmmm, could there be a reason for this?) The drawback is that Wal-Mart people have a tendency to scare the hell out of me. But that's another story.....

From what I've read, Sears Holdings  has seen it's sales numbers decline every year since Sears merged with K-Mart back in 2005. Could Kmart possibly be dragging the iconic Sears down? After all, Sears has been around since 1886. And not so long ago, it was considered one of our country's most successful retailers. What went wrong?

I don't know what will eventually happen to Sears/Kmart, but I really hope they survive in the long run. Where else would I buy my Craftsman tools???

kw

Money Don't Sing Or Dance

I can never predict where the ideas for my stories will come from......

Taking a little quiet time before the Christmas Day activities kick into high gear, I plugged in a Neil Diamond CD to relax. First off, I always forget how good of a singer he is. It's not so much his actual voice (although it is great) as it is his delivery and phrasing of the lyrics. Anyway, after Sweet Caroline and Cracklin' Rosie kicked in, I couldn't resist the urge to pick up my guitar and play along. It made me think of how the simple things in life can be the most satisfying.

Flipping through the various songs on the CD, I came across one called "Forever In Blue Jeans". I was instantly drawn to the initial acoustic guitar riff. But the most compelling part of the song was when Neil sings.....

"Money talks, but it don't sing and dance, and it don't walk...."


I know it sounds silly, but this jump started the wheels in my head.

If you are constantly obsessed with material things and money, you may miss out on the things that matter most. As you go through life, take to time to stop and smell the roses. It's a big world out there, go out and experience it!

More importantly, cherish the people in your life. Unlike material things, they can not replaced. Money might temporarily buy you happiness but you can't put a price tag on family and friends. It's people who will share those special moments with you. And it's people who will support you when times are tough..

To all of the people who I am privileged to call my family and friends, I am grateful to have you in my life. I look forward to our days ahead and the countless memories that are waiting to be made.....

Have a  Merry Christmas and very Happy New Year!

kw

A Day of Non-Christmas Shopping

Right in the mist of the hectic holiday shopping season, I found myself needing a few personal items. As luck would have it, I would have to make three stops. So, I finally got my head together and prepared to set out for what would be an eventful journey.

My first stop is at BJ's Wholesale Club where the parking lot is expectantly jam-packed. Watching the "Battle of the Parking Spaces" from a safe distance, I decide to park at the far end of the lot and walk off a portion of the burger I had for lunch. As I get closer to the front entrance, I hear no fewer than three profanity-laced exchanges between the Battle participants. It really puts me in the Christmas spirit.....

Once I get inside, I walk over to the computer section so I can pick up item number one: ink cartridges for my printer. I grab them and start for the checkout line. When I see about eight people in the shortest line, I decide to kill a little time by looking around the store (or is it a warehouse?). A store employee asks if I'd like to sample what appears to be a Hickory Farms summer sausage. Imagining what these things are made of, I politely decline.

As I move towards the back of the store, I nearly lose my kneecaps to one of those silly looking shopping carts with the kid's car on the front. Thanks to my gazelle-like agility, I'm able to jump out of the way just before impact. The woman "driver" apologizes but the kid in the car seems to really have gotten some amusement out of the near collision. Personally, I think he was giggling just a bit too much.....

I decide to head to the checkout line again. The self checkout lines are a little less backed-up. So, I forego the human interaction and eventually scan my package. Of course, there's a problem. It doesn't scan the first time so I try it several more times. I guess there's a limit on the amount of times you can incorrectly scan an item because a flashing police-like light begins to flash above my scanner. An expressionless young lady comes over and puts a key into an override switch and then punches in a secret code. She walks away without looking at me and tells me to try it again. I do and it finally scans.

I pay for my item and then head towards the exit. There, I run into another line. This is where we all have to get our goods inspected to make sure that we didn't steal anything. I always hate this at the whoesale clubs. The familiar lady at the door gives the "Hello-How ya doin'-Thank you-Bye Bye-Have a good one-Thank you-Bye Bye" routine (if you've ever been to the Pasadena BJ's, you know what I'm talking about).

Next stop...Sears. To pick up item number two: an axe......

As I roll out of the parking lot and prepare to make a right turn onto the main street, there's an inconsiderate asshole in front of me who decides to ignore the No Left Turn sign. So, I wait a few minutes and then I start to get really annoyed. I get tired of following the rules just to watch pricks like this do as they please. So, I give me a little toot of my horn as I point to the No Left Turn sign. He flips me the bird! Can you believe this? Returning the Christmas cheer, I flip him off and lay on my horn a little more. He finally guns his engine, makes his left turn and bolts out into traffic, narrowly missing an oncoming car.

I make a right turn and head out to the main street where I immediately hit a red light. Absorbed in John Cougar's "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus", I don't realize that the light tuned green. This causes the driver behind me to not toot, but lay on his horn which causes my middle finger to immediately go up. The driver really needs to learn the appropriate use of the horn. There's a huge difference between a toot and full blast. And admittedly, I need to work on the liberal use of my middle finger.....

I finally get to Sears only to find out that they are completely out of axes. How can the home of Craftsman tools  not have a single ax? Is there a Paul Bunyan convention in town?

Disappointed, I abandon the ax idea for the day and move on to item number three:  2012 refill pages for my Day-Planner.

I pull into the Office Depot parking lot where I see several people walking their dogs into neighboring Petsmart. I never quite understood why pet owners feel the need to take their pets shopping.

As I make my way into the Office Depot, I'm greeted by a young man wearing one of those earpieces with the microphone that sticks out in front of his face. He looks more like an air traffic controller than an Office Depot employee. I go back to the Day-Planner section. While I'm searching for my refills, a woman walks right in front of me, actually bumping me as she goes by. There's not so much as an "Excuse me" from her. Maybe it's good that Sears didn't have that ax after all.

Later on, I see this same woman bump into a tub of Sharpies, knocking several of them to the floor. Of course, she moves on and doesn't bother to pick them up. I'm sorry, but ignorant people like this shouldn't be allowed to shop unsupervised.

I  see another woman who is trying to decide between two inexpensive e-Readers. I tell her to spend the extra money and get the Nook or the Kindle. She thanks me but I still think that she went with the off-brand model to save a few bucks.

I pay for my item and the young cashier encourages me to go online and fill out a survey regarding my shopping experience. I never fill those things out but I'm seriously considering copying and pasting this blog entry into their survey just to see if I get a reaction.

Later on, in attempt to wind down, I decide to join some friends at a neighborhood pub for a drink. As I walk toward the front door, an intoxicated guy stumbles out and greets everyone with a cheerful "Merry F*cking Christmas"! Real nice.......

Shopping for me always tends to be adventurous, but never so much as around Christmas. Maybe next year, I'll try to order my ax and Day-Planner refills online. But then again, that's what I say every year.....

kw

Social Security Tax Cuts

There's nothing like waiting until the last minute to get your chores done. And that's exactly what Congress is doing in regards to the extension of the Social Security tax cuts. There is a House bill right now that will, in all likelihood, be shot down by the Democratically controlled Senate. If it somehow miraculously passes the Senate, President Obama has vowed to veto it.

So, what's the problem? First off, there's the usual partisan bickering over how much the tax rate should be. It is currently at 4.2 percent rate (down from it's previous 6.2% rate). The Republicans are ok with extending the 4.2 rate. Of course, nothing can be simple. So, there are some other things thrown into the bill (we'll look at those shortly). The Democrats want to drop the temporary tax cut down to 3.1 percent. Hey, I don't usually usually side with the Dems, but I kind of like this idea.

The real problem comes in when we add the follow things to the mix:

• The Republicans want to reduce unemployment benefits to 59 weeks. The Democrats want to keep it at the current 99 weeks.
• A federal government worker pay freeze through 2013and eliminating unemployment insurance for millionaires. This is the Republicans idea for offsetting the tax cut, while the Democrats want to raise the taxes on millionaires.
• A cut in the amount that Medicare reimburses doctors
• A proposal to begin work on the 1700 mile Keystone oil pipeline that will run from Canada to Texas. Of course, this will create a lot of jobs in an ailing economy. But it doesn't appeal to the tree-hugging crowd. Plus, President Obama wants to deal with the pipeline issue after the election. Hmmm.....

Ok, here's what really bothers me. Why can't we just vote on one item at a time? Since the tax cuts are due to expire in a couple of weeks, shouldn't we make it the priority? This isn't a barbarque, so what do you say we   put the pork back in the freezer?

So, if the bickering continues and the tax cuts are not extended, 160 million American workers will be affected next year. In a nut shell, the rate will increase by 2% on January 1, which means that a household making $50,000 will pay $1000 more in taxes in 2012. A household making $100,000 will send Uncle Sam $2000 more in taxes. You get the drift........

And there are some that want the rate to increase. The argument being that the Social Security fund is already in bad shape and needs all of the tax dollars that it can get. Last year, for the first time, Social Security paid out more than it brought in. However, from what I understand, the fund can continue to pay out full benefits until 2037. But I have my doubts. Personally, I would rather not contribute anything to the Social Security fund and instead, direct the "tax" into a legitimate growth fund. Further yet, how about if Uncle Sam just gives me a full refund on all of the Social Security taxes that I've paid over my working career? Just send me what I put in, I don't want a dime more. I figure I'll be bet better off rolling it into almost any other investment rather than taking my chances with the government's retirement idea.

Our government really needs to get their ass in gear and start doing the job that we sent them to Washington to do. One way or another, make a damned decision!

kw

The Hottest Woman Ever?

I was recently looking through the latest issue of Men's Health magazine. Nah, I wasn't interested in the latest breakthrough in fat-burning foods or the most efficient bicep workout. I was actually curious to see who they ranked as the 100 Hottest Women of All-Time.

Let me cut right to the chase. Here is who made the top ten (for the full list, see attached link at bottom):

10. Angelina Jolie
9. Jane Fonda
8. Pamela Anderson
7. Bettie Paige
6. Ursula Andress
5. Madonna
4. Britney Spears
3. Marilyn Monroe
2. Raquel Welch
1. Jennifer Aniston

Ok, first off, let me preface this by saying that I recently watched "Horrible Bosses" starring Jennifer Aniston. I imagine guys were lining up to become dental assistants after seeing this one! So, it's hard to argue that Jennifer Aniston is not hot. She absolutely is. But the hottest woman of all time? I don't know about this one.

If I had compiled the list, Raquel Welch would have been hands-down the number one choice. I can remember sitting through One Million B.C. many times as a kid, and I still couldn't tell you what the movie was about. Why? Because Raquel, running around in the skimpy lion-cloth, had my undivided attention.

And I couldn't believe that Sophia Loren didn't crack the top ten. I remember seeing her in Grumpier Old Men several years ago. I'm guessing she was in her mid 70's and she still looked hot! I can only imagine the impact she had on adolescent boys back in her prime.

What about Anna Kournokova? She's why I became interested in tennis years ago! She came in at a surprising 29 spot. Number 29 for the hottest female athlete of all time? It didn't matter that Anna never won a singles title at a Grand Slam event. When she skirted across the court in those revealing outfits, the score was irrelevant.

Perhaps even more surprising was Ann Margret coming in at number 28. Another woman who held up well to the test of time. Even her cartoon likeness (Ann Marg-rock) on The Flintstones was hot! No doubt, this woman should be in the top ten.

I don't understand Madonna coming in at number five. Sure, she was provocative and sexual, but the fifth hottest woman of all time? No way. She wouldn't have even made my top fifty.

And Jane Fonda in the top 10? I see no beauty at all in this treasonous bitch. Perhaps if we were talking about the top 100 traitors of all time, one could make a valid argument for her spot in the top ten. And how does Fonda finish one spot higher than Angelina Jolie?

And where is Scarlett Johansson in all of this? She came in at number 12. I personally think that she's the hottest modern day actress and is deserving of a higher spot than 12.

I'm also surprised that Farrah Fawcett (#31) didn't finish much higher. Let's face it, she was the main reason the guys tuned into Charlie's Angels years ago. She was the premiere pin-up girl of the 70s.

Ok, so with all of this being said, Jennifer Aniston is well deserving of a spot in the top ten. Personally, I think she looks better now than she did on "Friends" years ago. Considering she's 40-something now and still one of the hottest actresses out there says a lot. I love her movies. She's funny, witty and has that "girl next door" presence that I admire. I'm just not sure that I would rank her the hottest woman ever. But for what it's worth, I think Jennifer is hotter than Angelina. Sorry, Brad....

kw

http://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/hottest-women-all-time

The $250 Million Dollar Man

For the life of me, I'll never figure out the ridiculous salaries that are paid to professional athletes. Most recently, former St. Louis Cardinal's slugger Albert Pojols signed a $250 million deal with the Los Angeles Angels. That's $25 million a year for the next ten years.

I know there's a lot of work and dedication that goes into becoming a professional ball player, but $25 million a year? Come on! Think about it...... assuming that Pojols gets paid every other week, like most American workers, his gross pay is over $1 million each paycheck! This is more than many of his fans will make in a lifetime.

And if I'm not mistaken, Pojols still isn't the highest paid player in baseball. Alex Rodriquez of the New York Yankees is currently on a $275 million/10 year contract. Holy Toledo, Batman! Can these guys ever possibly spend all of this money? I mean, once you got a couple hundred million in your pocket, do you really need any more? Is it really worth packing your bags and leaving a city and/or team that has supported you for all of these years?


I don't want it to seem like I'm singling out Albert Pojols. He just happens to be the latest recipient of these outrageous baseball contracts. Pojols seems like a nice guy and you can't dispute the numbers that he puts up year after year. I was personally impressed with his three home-run performance in Game 5 of this year's World Series (the only other players ever to do this were Babe Ruth and Reggie Jackson).

Speaking of Babe Ruth, arguably the greatest player ever, he earned $785,000 over his entire career. Some of the modern players earn that much by the seventh inning stretch on Opening Day!

It just seemed like yesterday when we saw the first one million dollar baseball contract. Depending on which source you reference, the first $1 million man was either Nolan Ryan or Dave Parker. There is a contract  technicality that could give the honor to either player.

As a kid back in the 70's, I used to like to watch "The Six Million Dollar Man". Steve Austin could see for miles and throw about 2000 miles per hour with his bionic body parts. But his $6 million price tag pales in comparison to the professional athletes of today.

I'm sure, as new superstars are born, there will be even more lucrative contracts. I wonder if we'll live to see the first billion dollar man? It could happen.......

kw

20 Awesome Rock Albums

I always enjoy sitting around talking about music with my buddies. It always brings back memories of those younger days when everyone was riding through the high school parking lot blasting their favorite band through a set of Jenson coaxials.

To be quite honest, I have lost interest in most of the modern day rock and roll. These days, I prefer country music (before you grill me, see my blog entitled "I'm A Little Bit Country". It will help explain things). However, I will forever be hooked on the records and bands of my youth. Although they're subject to change without notice, here are twenty of my all time favorite rock albums. Some are very familiar, others maybe not. But, if you're a rock and roll fan, all of the following albums all worthy of a spot on your CD shelf.


Foreigner - self titled - When these guys first hit the scene back in the 70's, you knew they were destined to make it big. I was instantly drawn to Lou Gramm's versatile vocals and Mick Jones' catchy guitar transitions. This is one of those rare albums that I owned on vinyl, 8-track, cassette and CD. Basic rock and roll, but I'll never get tired of listening to it. All of the songs are great, but I particularly love the hard driving "War of the Worlds".



Aerosmith - Rocks - I could probably make a valid argument for any of the early Aerosmith albums, but Rocks tends to be my favorite. It was produced very well but it still had that raw edge that I liked so much about 70's Aerosmith. I love the groove of "Last Child". I can't imagine anyone other than Steven Tyler singing it. "Back In The Saddle" And "Sick As A Dog" are two of my all time favorites on this album too. Tyler and Perry might have been The Toxic Twins back then, but they're songwriting was brilliant.


The Black Crowes - Shake Your Money Maker - Just when I thought rock was on it's last leg, along comes The Black Crowes. The first time that I heard "Jealous Again" I was blown away. The southern vibe with the bluesy guitar sound were perfect companions for Chris Robinson's soulful vocals. "She Talks To Angels" is a beautiful song that is quite capable of giving you goosebumps. And the Crowe's cover of Otis Redding's "Hard To Handle" is top notch.



Def Leppard -High n' Dry - The beginning guitar riff to "Let It Go" is one of my all time favorites. I used to love playing this song with my band mates years ago. High n' Dry is a little more polished than the band's debut album (On Through The Night), but it still captures all of the energy. "Bringing On The Heartbreak" has become a classic rock ballad. I have to admit that I was disappointed when they remixed it and added keyboards. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.



Van Halen - self-titled -  The first time that I heard "Eruption", my jaw dropped. Eddie Van Halen carried forward the torch that Jimi Hendrix lit so many years ago. Van Halen's cover of "You Really Got Me" has become a iconic. I love the heavy, steady rhythm section of Alex Van Halen and Michael Anthony. And David Lee Roth is one of those rare frontmen who can legitimately be mentioned in the same breath with Mick Jagger or Robert Plant.



AC/DC - Highway To Hell - I loved Back In Black almost as much, but Highway to Hell gets the slight edge because of Bon Scott. His unique vocals were the perfect fit for Angus Young's simplistic, yet powerful guitar riffs. I love the title track as well as "The Girls Got A Rhythm" and "Beatin' Around The Bush". I've always wondered what Bon Scott would have sounded like on the Back In Black album.




Guns n' Roses - Appetite For Destruction - In my opinion, the greatest debut rock album of all time. This record oozes with attitude. The songwriting is brilliant and Axl Rose's screeching voice is complimented perfectly by Slash's blistering yet melodic guitar solos. The rhythm section of Izzy, Duff and Steve complete the recipe for one hell of a rock band. Of course, "Welcome to the Jungle" and "Sweet Child o' Mine" have become classics. But I always loved "Out To Get Me" and "Night Train". Every song on this one totally kicks ass!


4 Non-Blondes - Bigger, Better, Faster, More - Every now and then, a record will come out of left field. For me, this is the one. The first time I heard "What's Up", I was instantly drawn to Linda Perry's energetic vocal style. I had never heard anyone like her and instantly went out and bought the CD. I was pleasantly surprised to find that the other songs on the record were just as good. I particular like "Calling All The People" and "Morphine & Chocolate". The biggest problem that I have with this band is that they never came out with a follow-up album.


Led Zeppelin - IV - How do you pick a favorite Zeppelin album? They're all great! But I'm going to settle on the fourth album. And although this album has the most famous rock ballad of all time (Stairway To Heaven), it's not why I like this record so much. More precisely, "Rock and Roll" was the song that first made me want to pick up a guitar. The title says it all. Also, I love the groove of "Misty Mountain Hop" (by the way, 4 Non-Blondes also do a killer version!). And how can you not love the guitar riff of "Black Dog"? "When The Levee Breaks" has a mysterious vibe that goes right along with the mystique of the album name, cover, etc.

Alcatrazz - Disturbing The Peace - An album that's not on everyone's radar, but it should be. Although not a household name, this album features one of rock's greatest vocalists, Graham Bonnet. This record also features my favorite guitar player, Steve Vai. The opening song, "God Blessed Video" makes you want to instantly crank up the volume. I blew out a set of speakers in my old Cutlass Supreme listening to this one years ago. "Stripper" and "Wire & Wood" are two of my other favorites on this record. Trust me, this is one good rock album!


Rush - 2112 - I loved all of their early stuff, but 2112 is still the Rush album that I like best. I couldn't tell you how many times that I've listened to this one from start to finish. This was my first experience with a concept album. I loved the story line of a guy discovering a guitar and music from the "ancient world" in the year 2112. On the B side, "Passage To Bangkok" is one of my all time favorite Rush tunes as well.




Vandenberg - self-titled - During the heavy metal era of the early 80's, it took awhile for this album to sink in for me. The power ballad "Burning Heart" got a fair amount of airplay. "Wait" and "Lost In A City" were two of my favorite tracks. Adrian Vandenberg is a really good guitar player who often doesn't get the recognition he deserves. By the way, how many other Dutch rock bands can you name?




Y&T - Mean Streak - Of all the albums that I've ever owned, I would have to say Mean Streak is the one that I have listened to the most. I absolutely love this record. Dave Meniketti's powerful vocals and tasteful guitar work puts this album in my top three of all-time. The harmonies are also noteworthy. I can't pick just one song on this one, I love them all! Meniketti is another great guitarist who often got overshadowed by some of the more flashy players of the 80's.



Pink Floyd - Dark Side of the Moon - Pink Floyd has the unique ability to "pull you" into a song. Just listen to "Breathe" or "Brain Damage" through a set of headphones and you'll see what I'm talking about (for enhancement, add your favorite adult beverage). And if you don't get goosebumps after hearing guest vocalist Clare Torry's performance on "The Great Gig In the Sky", you should check your pulse! Brilliant songwriting and passionate musicianship make this record an absolute masterpiece.


Black Sabbath - Heaven And Hell - No one knew what to expect when Sabbath announced they were replacing legendary front man Ozzy Osbourne. But the mystery was solved as soon as Ronnie James Dio belted out the opening lines to "Neon Knights". Dio probably delivered a song better than anyone who ever graced the rock stage. "Lady Evil" and "Children of the Sea", as well as the title track, are my favorites. I always loved the album cover too.


Queensryche - Operation Mindcrime - Another concept album that really sparked my interest. I have always been a big fan of Queensryche. Listening to this album takes you on a thrilling journey of corruption, murder and conspiracy. Musically, Queensryche is as technically solid as you can get. And singer Geoff Tate has one the best vocal ranges the rock world has ever known. Mindcrime was the predecessor to the band's commercially sucessful Empire album. An equally good album in my opinion.


Scorpions - Lovedrive - The first album recorded with new guitarist Matthias Jabs set the German band on a course for huge success in America. From the adrenaline filled "Another Piece of Meat" to the melodic "Holiday", this album delivers the goods. As a bonus, Michael Schenker plays guitar on three of the album's songs. The original album cover drew some controversy. Can you imagine why?




Crack The Sky - White Music - Unless you live in the Baltimore area, you may have never heard of this band. But trust me, they're awesome. I could have just as easily picked their debut album, but I liked the quirkiness of White Music just a little more. "All American Boy" and "Suspicion" are two of my favorites. And I love the unconventional tempo change when the guitar solo kicks in on "Hot Razors In My Heart". These guys can play!



UFO - The Essential UFO. - Ok, I know it's a "best of" album, but I had to include it anyway. By far, one of my favorite all time bands, this record packs a ton of energy. I love Michael Schenker's intro guitar riff to "Rock Bottom". The heavy pounding "Too Hot To Handle" and "Lights Out" always gets my heart rate up. The slow building "Cherry" is one of my favorite UFO tunes.You can't go wrong with any song on this one.




Judas Priest - Unleashed In The East - This album sounds so good that I've always questioned whether it was doctored up. Nonetheless, I've seen these guys live several times, and I can tell you that they nail it. Rob Halford's legendary vocals with the guitar tandem of Tipton and Downing make this the perfect live album for any hard rock fan. It still amazes me that "Diamonds and Rust" was originally done by Joan Baez. I'm sure most people will agree that Priest's version is much better. The "Victim of Changes" track off of this record remains one of my favorite rock tunes ever.



The Cult - Sonic Temple - The first time I heard this album, I was blown away. "Fire Woman" and "Sun King" have all of the piss and vinegar that you would expect from a heavy rock album. But the slower "Edie" delivers just as much passion as the up-tempo songs. A great album to have on your I-Pod while you're working out!


kw

Weddings - Breaking It All Down

Weddings are so predictable. Yeah, yeah, there's the usual, "Do you take this woman, do you take this man, you may now kiss the bride, are you sure you want to go through with this, etc.". But there's also many other things that you can count on...

For instance, the stress factor increases the minute I start getting ready for a wedding. Although I have about twenty pairs of dress pants, five or six suits, several blazers/sport-coats and countless dress shirts, I am always faced with the same last minute dilemma:  nothing fits! This revelation always causes me to go into a momentary state of depression as my usual excuse of "the dryer must be shrinking my clothes" goes out the window.

So, I go through the ritual of trying on endless combinations of skin tight outfits. I narrow the selection down to the ones that don't completely cut off my circulation. Eventually, I settle on the one that allows me to breathe with the least amount of pain.

Even my shoes are uncomfortably tight! How does that happen? I feel like I'm going through a Chinese foot binding ritual as a gingerly walk out to my car. I'm seriously concerned that my feet will be completely numb by the time I get to the wedding. Have you ever tried to brake a mid-size sedan with numb feet?

Once I get to the wedding facility, I hear the women saying, "Let's sit up front, so we can see." It's as if Mick Jagger and the boys are getting ready to hit the stage. Settle down ladies, I'm sure wherever you sit, you're going to be able to see.

Once the bride and groom roll down the aisle, the women will start with, "Aw, doesn't she look beautiful? Isn't that dress just gorgeous?" Meanwhile, I'm fully engaged in conversation with the guys about whether there will be an open bar at the reception.

When we finally get to the reception, the women turn the critiquing completely around. Instead of complimenting the bride's dress, they now focus their attention on the "inappropriate" wedding clothes of the other female guests.

"Oh, my God. Can you believe she's wearing that? She's practically hanging out of it. The only thing missing is a stripper pole!"

To add fuel to the fire, the guys are all huddled together with their tongues hanging out as Miss Pole Dancer strolls onto center stage then proceeds to wiggle and jiggle to the bass line of Brick House. Yeah, she was definitely lettin' it all hang out.

As the party swings into high gear, the dance floor becomes populated with a group of line dancers. I try to avoid this at all costs. Several years ago, someone roped me into to doing the Electric Slide. By the time we got to the second verse, at least five people were writhing in pain as a result of my big ass crashing into them. In the name of public safety, no more line dancing for me!

And it's inevitable that the DJ will play at least one stupid ass song like The Hokey-Pokey or The Chicken Dance. And what's up with that song Da Butt? Yeah, that one. Is it really an appropriate song to play in front of Aunt Mildred? And just when you think it can't get any more uncomfortable, the DJ cues up Strokin' by the illustrious Clarence Carter.

And it drives me nuts when they play Buster Poindexter's Hot, Hot, Hot and then encourage everyone to conga out to the parking lot. People may think I'm a dick for not participating, but I refuse to risk spilling my beer for such a worthless cause.

During the course of the reception, you'll always run into people you haven't seen in years. Then you're bombarded with 101 questions. I'm seriously thinking about typing up a bio and handing it to everyone who hits me with the mother of all open-ended questions......"So, what have ya been up to?" I figure they can catch up on the past ten years of my life while I grab another beer.

As the reception nears the end, the plan for the after-party begins. Now, when I was younger, I would look forward to round two. But nowadays, an afternoon of partying only makes me look forward to a couple of Tylenol PM's and a cozy bed.

So, I wish the happy couple the best and make my way out. But before I can get through the lobby, I'm confronted by several friends and my sister-in-law (we affectionately refer to her as "the pusher") who insist that I join them at the after party.

How can I say no to friends and family?? Oh well, maybe I'll just go for one more drink........:-)

kw

Black Friday Frenzy

Well, another Black Friday shopping frenzy is in the books. I'm always amazed at the lengths in which some folks will go in order to land that great deal on a China-made electronics gadget. By noon, some people were already camped out in front the local Best Buy, Target, Walmart, etc. By the time the front doors were opened, they were like a group of hungry lions about to be released into a field of unsuspecting wildebeests. Of course, in this case, the role of the wildebeest would be played by a $99 flat screen TV.


There were plenty of adrenaline-laced incidents yesterday. Some of the more eventful episodes:

• Monroeville, PA - Mothers and daughters get into a fistfight over a hot deal on yoga pants at the Victoria's Secret. I though yoga was supposed to relax you and help you find that inner peace?
• Myrtle Beach, SC - A 55 year-old woman is shot in an attempted robbery. A nice way to end the shopping day, huh?
• Rome, NY - Several fights break out in the electronics section at the local Wal-Mart. May be this will inspire a new video game: Wally World Beatdown
• Los Angeles, CA - A woman hits the Wal-Mart crowd with a dose of pepper spray in order to secure an X-Box. Her kids will be so proud.
• Fayetteville, NC - Gun fire erupts in the food court at the Cross Creek Mall. Nothing wakes up an early morning shopper like caps busting at 2 am.
• New York, NY - A mob of anxious shoppers literally broke down the door at a Hollister store. Then they proceeded to loot the place. Now, that's the Christmas spirit!
• Phoenix, AZ - A grandfather is knocked unconscious and bloodied up at the Wal-Mart by the local cops after being suspected of shoplifting.
• Leandro, CA - A woman is shot after being robbed of your purchases outside of the Wal-MArt.
• Kinstown, NC - Security guards pepper sprayed aggressive shopping as they tried to grab items before they were unloaded from pallets. 

And I'm not sure where the particular Wal-Mart was in this case, but I saw a feeding frenzy over a stack of $2 toasters. One woman emerged from the pile with about five or six of them. She shoots, she scores! By the way, who in the hell wants to get a toaster for Christmas??

I find it amazing that people are transformed into savages simply by the lure of a low price. As the years go by, it seems that we get more and  more obsessed with material things. It's really sad. 

kw

Holiday Shopping - Literally Speaking

I just finished reading an article about a Target employee who is petitioning the retailer to cancel it's Thanksgiving night opening this year. At last count, there were roughly 100,000 signatures. If it comes my way, I will gladly sign it too.

Have we lost all sense of family and tradition? I mean, is it really going to make that big of a difference if Target (or any other retailer) waits until the morning of Black Friday to open the doors? Once the Christmas shopping season begins, the merchandise is going to move. So, is it really worth ruining the Thanksgiving holiday for the bulk of your employees? Christmas has already been hijacked by commercialism, isn't that enough?

Before anyone nails me to the wall, I know that are certain occupations that have to operate 24/7, 365 days a year. I happen to be in that category and I fully accept it. However, I don't think that a great deal on a plasma TV is so urgent that it has to be purchased at 10 pm on Thanksgiving night.

And if the doors are going to open at 10 pm, you know damned well  that people will start lining up by noon. This will exponentially add to the number of people who will be separated from their families on turkey day. And for what? To save a few bucks on the latest electronic gadget? Is it really worth it?

Adding salt to the wound for major retailer employees in the Baltimore area, the Ravens play on Thanksgiving night. I, along with countless others, am looking forward to winding down after a good dinner and watching the game with family and friends. I feel bad for the Target employees who will only get to see the game sneaking into the break room.

I know what you're going to say......."But Ken, people have to work in order for the NFL games to go on." Yeah, yeah, yeah, I hear you. But just like the mailman who trudges through rain and snow, football must go on.

Oops, I just realized that mailmen have off on holidays. Oh well, when did I ever let facts get in the way of a good story....

All I can say is, unless you happen to need a new TV to watch the game, stay away from the retailers on Thanksgiving!

kw

The Penn State Scandal

As the details of the Penn State scandal continue to unfold, I find it very intriguing. Last week, we learned that an assistant coach had walked in Jerry Sandusky while he was raping a young boy. It was first reported that the coach reported the crime to Penn State authorities but failed to call the local police. But this morning, I read that the coach is claiming that he did indeed talk to the police. But the police are saying that they knew nothing about it. Nonetheless, if this coach did indeed witness Sandusky sexually assaulting a child, why didn't he just crack his f*cking skull??

I don't usually advocate violence, but in the case of a child molester, all bets are off. These sick bastards are the lowest form of humanity and don't deserve to live. There is nothing worse than a monster who robs a child of his or her innocence. Am I wrong for feeling  this way?

Of course, Jerry Sandusky will get his day in court, but things certainly don't look good for him. Just yesterday, I saw an interview where Sandusky admits, on national television no-less,  that he often showered with young boys. Huh? I'm sorry, but it's not normal for a grown man to be routinely lathering up and "horsing around" with ten year olds. If he were doing this with a child of mine, I'd be more than just a little pissed.

Also, when asked by NBC's Bob Costas* if he was sexually attracted to young boys, Sandusky hemmed and hawed before finally saying that he wasn't. What normal person even has to think about a question like that? Another damaging move that I'm sure that the prosecution will use against him.

There certainly seems to be an element of a cover-up at Penn Sate. But we'll let the investigation determine how deep it went. My understanding is that Penn State University is exempt to opening up their records to the public. That should make things just a little more interesting.

If the molestation charges turn out to be true, Penn State may suffer irreparable damage to both it's reputation and it's financial future. Look at what happened to the Catholic church as a result of turning its back on decades of molestation by pedophile priests. In my opinion, they didn't pay nearly enough for all of the lives that they ruined!

Sarah Palin recently commented on the situation by saying, "Hang 'em from the highest tree. I'll bring the rope."* If it turns out that any of these allegations about Jerry Sandusky are true, I'm with Sarah.......

Some might say that I'm barbaric or unreasonable. But I have a feeling they would have quite a different outlook if it was their kid who was being violated by one of these monsters.

Remember the victims......

kw

* http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45314171/ns/us_news-life/#.TsQp8cNCqU8

Legend of the Camel Cricket

Growing up, I never particularly cared for insects, but they never really frightened me either. When I eventually moved to Anne Arundel County, all this changed. There, I was introduced to one of the most incredible bugs in the history of civilization. Although the locals like to call them "cricket spiders', I discovered that the actual name of this bug is camel cricket.

This half cricket half spider has the ability to create a whole lot of uneasiness. The first time I saw one of these creatures, I totally freaked out. I was over Tina's parent's house and went outside to get a couple of logs for the fire. After picking up a log, something lunged at me, bounced off of my chest and attached itself to the ceiling of the back porch. I dropped the log and impulsively shouted, "Whoa! What the f*ck was that???"

From the ceiling, it  just stared at me like he was daring me to move. Even though I outweighed this thing by over two hundred pounds, I was still scared to death! I had never seen anything like this! It looked liked some kind of mutant ninja cricket. Dazed and confused, I couldn't take my eyes off of it.

Wondering what was taking me so long, Tina came outside. I gave her the hand signal to stay back. She looked at me like I was nuts, and asked, "What's going on?" I pointed to the ceiling. She laughed and then she informed me that it was "only" a cricket-spider. Now, not only did I feel scared, I also felt stupid. I grew up in the city where I would occasionally see cockroaches and other nasty bugs, but this was something completely foreign to me.

Surprised, I replied, "You've seen these things before?"

She was amazed that this was my first encounter with the infamous cricket-spider. But God knows, it wouldn't be my last.

The amazing thing about these things is that they have the ability to jump incredible distances using unnatural angles. I've seen them jump onto a wall, then onto the ceiling, then to the floor and back up to the ceiling. It's like a cricket on steroids! And the worst thing is that they don't chirp like a traditional cricket, making it easy to ambush an unsuspecting victim. And they have absolutely no fear of humans. If you walk towards most crickets or spiders, their defense mechanisms will kick in and they will scurry away. But the cricket-spider will stand it's ground and defy you to take another step.

Sometimes they will sneak up behind you and perch themselves on the back of your chair or sofa. When you turn around, there's this prehistoric looking creature staring at you like a lion might eye up a wildebeest. It's crazy!

They are also very resilient to blunt force trauma. One day, I saw one trespassing in our kitchen. Knowing that I would need more than my bare hands, I rolled up a Sports Illustrated magazine and entered the octagon. I circled the bastard in a lame attempt to come up behind him. But as I circled, he pivoted his grotesque body while never losing eye contact with me. I raised the magazine and took a swat at him, but he jumped out the way just in the nick of time and wound up on the kitchen counter. Knowing that I'd get earful from Tina if I smashed him on the counter, I swatted at the bug horizontally to knock him back to the floor. Once again, I missed the bug. But this time I hit my Hooters coffee mug causing it to fall and break into pieces on the kitchen floor. And I have no way to prove this, but the cricket-spider appeared to be bouncing up and down as if he was taunting me!

Reeling from the loss of my favorite coffee cup, I started to talk to the bug like he was human, "You've done it now, you little bastard! Break my Hooters mug, will you? Now, you're gonna get a serious ass whoopin'!"

The full force of the Sports Illustrated came down on the bug's body. But amazingly, even though it was visibly broken, it still managed to crawl across the floor in it's final act of defiance. He eventually expired in the corner and his taunting days were history. Feeling elated that this battle was finally over, I scooped up his lifeless body with the magazine and tossed it outside. My hope was that it would serve as a warning to the next camel cricket who might want to tangle with me. But somehow, I knew the fearless nature of this bug would prove otherwise.

..............................................................................................................................................................

When she sees a bug or spider in the house, Tina will usually ask me to catch it and release it outside unharmed. But with the cricket-spider, all bets are off. She just tells me to kill it. Easy for her to say since I'm the one who has to go mano a mano with the hideous beast!

I have fought many battles with these creatures and I know as long as I live in this part of the world, I'll have to fight many more. I am experienced now, so I feel like I can somewhat defend myself against their attack. But if you happen to come across a camel cricket the first time, I urge you to proceed with extreme caution. It is an insect like no other......

kw

Cain Goes On The Defense

A few weeks ago, Herman Cain shocked political pundits when he suddenly became the "Republican to beat" in the 2012 presidential campaign. I figured that it was inevitable that Cain would stir up some controversy. At the very least, he was going to force the Democrats to abandon their usual race-card tactics. After all, it's tough to call the Republicans and TEA Party supporters racists when their front runner happens to be a black man.

Initially, there was some predictable nonsense about Cain being a "token black" for the Republicans, but it was quickly dismissed and Cain continued to gain momentum. But you just knew that there would be something else. And sure enough, just when you thought the dust was settling, they starting coming out of the woodwork.........

At last count, there were at least five women who have said that they were sexually harassed by Herman Cain. Of course, Cain denies it but he'll surely have to lay some serious defense cards on the table before this thing goes away.  The last I heard, Cain has offered to take a lie detector test. We'll have to wait and see how this whole thing unfolds. Personally, regardless of the outcome, I think this latest scandal will derail Cain's bid for the White House.

But here's what amazes me the most about this whole thing. Although Bill Clinton was the poster boy for sexual harassment,  he continues to walk on water as far as Democrats are concerned. And, of course, there's JFK. But if there's even a hint of sexual misconduct on the Republican side, the mainstream media throws them to the wolves before they even have a chance to defend themselves. There certainly seems to be a double standard here.

And where exactly are Rev. Al and Super Jesse on all of this? Here's a prominent black man (Cain) being accused of all of these awful things by several white women. And the race hustling Dynamic Duo are nowhere to be found! Oh that's right, Cain is a conservative black man. Nevermind....

And here's one other thing that comes to mind. If it turns out that this slew of accusations was orchestrated by the Democrats, does that make them racists? Almost any criticism of Barrack Obama will bring at least an insinuation of racism from the left. Why is it not the same when the shoe is on the other foot? Again, another double standard.

Hey look, I don't know how this whole thing is going to turn out for Herman Cain. If he did indeed have these skeletons in his closet, I'm not sure why he didn't anticipate the usual attack dogs digging them up. He is obviously a very bright man, so it's hard for to believe that he didn't see this coming. It really makes me wonder if there is actually any merit to these accusations.

From some of the things that I've read so far, there seems to be some controversy surrounding some of the accusers. I have read that at least one accuser works for the Obama administration* and another has a history of workplace complaints**. Could it be possible that these women have a financial motive? Who knows?

Cain will, no doubt, continue to tread the dirty waters of gutter politics for the upcoming weeks. But before we rush to judgement, I think we need to hear the whole story from all sides.....

kw

*http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/woman_obama_accused_herman_cain_YUPqjDLbeq89nhLTER8V6N

**http://news.yahoo.com/ap-exclusive-accuser-filed-complaint-next-job-080946066.html

Irish Spring - Hold The Hots!

I stopped off at Wal-Mart the other day for some cheap entertainment and also to pick up a few things. One of those things happened to be my beloved Irish Spring shower gel. I didn't realize until I used it that this was not my usual plain Jane Irish Spring. It turns out that I picked up a variety known as "Intensify".

I knew something was wrong as soon as I splashed the green gel onto my skin. I immediately felt a burning sensation all over my body, and especially in those places where you never want to feel a burning sensation! 

It felt like I had lathered up with Ben-Gay. Rubbing what felt like pepper out of my eyes, I struggled to read the back of the bottle. The description stated, "An electrifying scent experience that invigorates all your senses." I wasn't really sure what that meant, but I can tell you, it felt like I had a fire-breathing dragon bearing down on my ass! According to the ingredients, this particular bottle contained something called eucalyptus. The only other time I've heard this word was in cough drop commercials. So, what the hell was it doing in my bottle of Irish Spring? I'm definitely going to have to pay attention the next time I go shopping for soap!

Growing up, there were only a limited amount of soaps to choose from. A few that I remember are Ivory, Zest, Dial and some industrial-strength stuff called Lava. Probably because it was the cheapest soap on the market, we always had Ivory soap. It always had a unique, clean scent but it also had the tendency to severely dry your skin out. After taking a bath with Ivory, you had to stay away from any open flames because there was always a potential for spontaneous combustion.

Zest came with another issue. After bathing with it and drying off, you still felt like there was a soapy film on your skin. Compared to Ivory, Zest was probably the lesser of two evils, but I didn't care for either one.

As for Lava, I never used it. I'm not sure why, but I always had this image of Lava taking off three layers of skin. So, I just avoided it.

I was intrigued by the first Irish Spring commercials. Remember the close up of the knife shaving off the edge of the green and white bar? And the Irish girl saying, "Manly, yes. But I like it too!"? The first time I used it, I was hooked. I've been using it for years with no issues until now. So, I guess you can understand why I was shocked by this most recent bottle.

Whether you use traditional soap of a shower gel, just be sure to read the label before you buy it. You don't want any surprises like the one I experienced!

kw

Random Thoughts of Baseball

As I was watching last night's game, the usual baseball thoughts ran through my head: Will the pitcher through high and tight? Or will he throw an off-speed breaking ball? Will Tony LaRussa pinch hit for Chris Carpenter in the late innings? Playing from behind, will Texas try to "manufacture" a run or two by sacrificing runners into scoring position?

Although I don't follow baseball the way that I used to, I have to admit that this year's World Series grabbed my attention. St. Louis and Texas played their hearts out and took the series to the final game last night. Of course, the Cardinals wound up winning. But Texas deserves a ton of credit for their quest to become World Series champions for the first time in franchise history. Maybe next year......

All legitimate thoughts, but I also had some other random things dancing through my mind.......

For instance, why does the manager (and coaches) in baseball wear a uniform? It's not like their going to see any playing time. I believe that baseball is the only professional sport that does this. Back in the old days of Connie Mack and company, baseball managers used to wear suits. Maybe a bit overkill, but so is seeing a 260 pound coach squeezing his ass into a pair of form-fitting pinstripes. Can you imagine an NFL coach standing on the sidelines in a helmet and shoulder pads? Or an NBA coach in a pair of shorts? Ok, I think you get the point....

And what's up with the all of the tobacco chewing in baseball? I'm sure there are other athletes who partake in this nasty habit, but it seems to be most evident in baseball. Every time the camera pans the field, you can see a player or two spitting spent tobacco juice onto the field, especially around the batters box. I would really hate to be a catcher! And can you imagine rounding third and realizing that you have to slide into that brown puddle around home plate? No thanks, I think I'll retreat back to third base!

And what's the purpose of the first base coach? After all, professional baseball players have been in the game since they were kids. Don't you think they know that they have to run to first base after hitting the ball? And on their their way to first base, the whole play is in front of them. Do they really need someone to explain what's going on? If the pitcher attempts a pick-off play, the coach yells, "Get back!" Really? I would have never figured that one out......

And then there is the "purpose pitch". This is where a pitcher "sends a message" by plucking the batter with a 90 mph fastball. If he wants to put an exclamation point on it, the pitcher will queue up some "chin music". This is where he sails the ball dangerously close to the batters head. Of course, this always presents the potential for a bench-clearing brawl. And there's always a possibility a key player will get ejected or injured. Some of the most infamous brawls that immediately come to mind:

• 1993 Seattle Mariners and the Baltimore Orioles - For twenty minutes, Camden Yards looked like LA after the Rodney King verdict. Plenty ejections and injuries in this one. 
• 2003 playoffs between the Yankees and Red Sox - Upon charging the pitcher's mound, 72 year-old coach Don Zimmer was tossed to the ground by Boston ace Pedro Martinez.
• 1993 Nolan Ryan vs. Robin Ventura - My all-time favorite! After getting plunked with a 100 mph fastball, Ventura charged towards the 44 year-old Ryan. Ventura was immediately caught in a headlock and received numerous pop-knots to his skull courtesy of the strike-out king. Keep in mind that Ventura was 20 years younger than Nolan Ryan! Thank goodness Texas catcher Ivan Rodriguez was there to save him!

So, with all of this said, does it really make sense for star players to risk injury during these melees? Here's my idea...

 In hockey, teams have a designated "goon". This guys main purpose is to go in and take care of business when bad blood is brewing. He is the enforcer! So, I propose that we have the same thing in baseball. Instead of risking injury to star players, each team could add an MMA cage fighter to the roster. In the event of any chin music, these guys would come rushing out of the opposing dugouts and whoop each other's ass on the pitcher's mound. I can see it now, the crowd would go wild!

Ok, let's settle down a bit. Another thing that I don't understand is why baseball players are always "adjusting" themselves. I saw one particular player grabbing at his crotch so much that I thought I was watching the video for Thriller!

And what's up with all of the long hair and dreadlocks these days? I can remember watching Johnny Damon from the Red Sox several years ago. He looked like the caveman from the Geico commercials. You would never catch Nolan Ryan looking like that!

I'm glad that was able to shed some light on all of these little nuances of the game. I hope that this will enhance the experience of your next ball game.....

kw

Love Those Scary Movies

With the Halloween season here, there's no better time to tune into a scary movie. A good horror movie has the ability to kick up our adrenaline and boost our heart rates (and we don't even have to go to a gym!). You certainly don't get that reaction from a romantic comedy. Although I don't watch many horror flicks anymore, I still have a few that stick in my mind. Here's a list of my top ten:


10. Friday the 13th - A bit of a "Halloween" rip-off, the original "Friday the 13th" accelerated the movement of crazed slasher films. The poor campers at Crystal Lake never stood a chance against the lurking Jason. Although the barrage of sequels became a bit ridiculous, I really liked the first Friday.

9. The Blair Witch Project - You either love or hate this movie. Personally, I thought it was great. A group of young film makers get lost in the woods while doing a documentary on the elusive Blair Witch. Shot without a soundtrack, this movie created an eerie feeling of uneasiness. And the ending was just downright scary.

8. Hostel - Movies that put unsuspecting Americans in dire straits while traveling abroad always have great potential. This one had me guessing until the end. Could something like this really happen? I sure wouldn't want to find out.

7. When A Stranger Calls - "We've traced the call. And it's coming from inside of the house"! One of the most frightening movie lines ever!

6. The Amityville Horror - I loved both the original and the remake. I would have moved out of the house on the first day! Being "based on a true story" made this one even more scary.

5. The Strangers - One of the more recent scary movies that I've seen, I found this one to be downright terrifying. Who were these people? And why did they decide to stop at this house? Liv Tyler gave a great performance. It definitely had me on the edge of my seat.

4. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre - One of the creepiest movies ever. The character Leatherface was loosely based on serial killer Ed Gein. This only added to the macabre of this film. The remote farmhouse was the perfect setting for this gritty adventure.

3. Halloween - A horror classic! A crazed madman who escapes from a mental institution always has unlimited potential to terrify us. Michael Myers is the epitome of a horror movie villain. Never knowing when he would be lurking behind a bush or a set of curtains kept audiences on the edge of their seats.

2. The Exorcist - When the devil comes to town, you know things are going to be rough. I saw this one when I was quite young and it scared the BeJesus out of me! Regan MacNeil remains one of the most iconic horror movie characters ever. Ironically, years later, I developed a crush on Linda Blair. I'm not sure what this says about me but there you have it....

1. The Shining - Regarding Stephen King, this is one the rare exceptions where the movie was better than the book. Watching Jack Nicholson's character's descent into madness was very compelling. Who can forget the classic "Here's Johnny" line? The setting and cast were perfect but beleive it or not, Jack Nicholson was not the first choice to play the lead role. Director Stanley Kubrick had Robert DeNiro and Robin Williams in mind, while writer Stephen King had his eyes on Jon Voight. A brilliant movie that I'll never get tired of watching.

An honorable mention goes out to "Saw" which provided a different twist on the traditional horror movie. I think they went a little crazy with the sequels, but the original film is definitely worth watching. It has plenty of gore with an element of suspense.

Although it didn't make my top ten, I must mention the movie Scream for a very good reason. While in Colorado years ago, I was looking to kill some time one Tuesday evening. So, I decided to catch a movie. I had heard some good reviews about Scream, so I bought a ticket. It turns out that not many people in Colorado go to the movies on a Tuesday night because I was the only person in the theater! I have to tell you, to watch a horror movie totally alone in a dark theater is the way to go! Impulsively, I kept looking behind me to see if anyone was sneaking up on me. I felt like I was ten years old! A unique adventure indeed.

Happy Halloween!

kw