The Ravens Serve Up Thanksgiving Dessert

The Ravens-Steelers rivalry is, no doubt, one of the best in the NFL. When these two teams get together, you know there's going to be a lot of trash-talking, on-field fighting and highlight-reel hits. Watching these two teams go at it is like watching Ali vs. Frazier. And last night was no different.....

As the game approached, I was in desperate need of a 5-Hour Energy shot. The tryptophan from a large turkey dinner was taking it's toll. But I was determined to hang it there for what would be another hard fought battle between the division rivals. So, I popped open a cold Sam Adams Oktoberfest and got ready for kick-off.

The usual gathering of family members who join us for Thanksgiving dinner hung out to to watch the game. A few good friends also came over to cheer on the Ravens. However, for the first time ever, I allowed a Steeler's fan to join us. Not only did he join us, but he also donned the team's jersey. I was a little worried that this had the potential to turn into Jerry Springer episode. 

As the game progressed, the Ravens took a small, but seemingly, comfortable lead. But as we've come to expect, the Steelers would eventually come back to make it another nail-biter.

The most controversial play came when Baltimore's Jacoby Jones returned a punt for 73 yards. As Jones blazed down the sideline, it appeared that he would go all the way for a touchdown. But as he approached the 20-yard line, Pittsburgh head coach Mike Tomlin was standing on the sideline in front of Jones, The Ravens punt returner had to cut in towards the middle of the field to avoid hitting Tomlin. As a result, Jones was tackled by Steelers' cornerback, Cortex Allen. The Ravens ultimately settled for a field goal.

Tomlin's excuse was that he was watching the punt return on the stadium's JumboTron. Perhaps that's true. But how can he not see that he's in the way? I mean, the JumboTron is 24 feet high and 100 feet wide. Even Stevie Wonder should have been able to see that he was in Jones' way!

With the referee a few feet behind the play, I can't believe that a flag wasn't thrown. The Ravens should have been awarded a touchdown. But for some reason, beyond my comprehension, the officials let it go.

Now, if I could rewind the clock, I would have liked to have seen it play out this way:

Jacoby Jones comes barreling down the sideline and sees that Tomlin is going to impede his path to the end zone. Jones lowers his shoulder and collides with Tomlin. The impact is so violent that it sends Tomlin's headset flying into the upper deck. As the Pittsburgh head coach lays there wondering what train hit him, Jones breaks into a Dancing With The Stars victory dance over top Tomlin's semi-conscious body. The crowd goes ape-shit as the referees gather to discuss what just happened. Eventually, the head ref announces, "The Pittsburgh head coach impeded the runners path, Therefore, by rule, this is a touchdown! Please relay this information to head coach when he regains consciousness." 

I know, I know, This might sound a bit extreme. But something similar happened to the Steelers on the way to the end zone when Steelers running back Le'Veon Bell attempted to punch the ball in from the 1-yard line. As Bell approached the goal line in the final minute of the game, he was leveled by Ravens Jimmy Smith. Bell's helmet came off and squirted through the end zone. Bell looked like he just took an uppercut from Mike Tyson as he appeared to be unconscious. I didn't know it until last night but when the runners helmet comes off, the play is dead. I wonder what happens if the runner is dead? 

The good news is that the Steelers running back, although a bit dizzy, was able to walk off the field. The Steelers made a valiant effort but came up a bit short. But the game proved to be another edge-of-your-seat showdown between the two division rivals.

The Ravens victory was a perfect dessert for the awesome Thanksgiving dinner that we enjoyed earlier in the day. I must mention that our lone Steelers fan was a good sport about everything. In a den full of rabid Ravens fans, it couldn't have been easy for him to sit through all our verbal abuse directed at the Steelers during the course of the game. Who knows, maybe we can convert him..........

kw

A Day of Giving Thanks - 2013

Thanksgiving is a time when we should give thanks and appreciation for all that is important in our lives. Whether it's family, friends or just the fact that we've made it to another day, there are certainly many things worthy of our appreciation.

There are mornings where I wake up and wonder what I ever did to deserve such a good life. I've got everything I ever wanted. As crazy as it sounds, I sometimes feel a little guilty about it. And although material things can certainly be nice, they have very little to do with it. A new car or a piece of jewelry might make you feel happy for a short time. But true happiness must come from within and it's the people in your life that bring it to the surface. Money doesn't make you nearly as rich as surrounding yourself with positive people.

Today, I am thankful for my family. Although we often get busy with our personal lives and maybe don't see each other as often as we'd like to, we know that we can always count on one another. I appreciate you more than you'll ever know.

I am also thankful for all of the good friends that have been a part of my life over the years. You have all touched me in some way and I am very grateful. One of my all-time favorite movies, "It's A Wonderful Life", pretty much sums it up for me. Without family and close friends, we are nothing. At the end of the classic movie, George Bailey's brother proposes a toast and says, "To my big brother George, the richest man in town." From the first time I saw the movie, I wanted to be "George".

Additionally, I am thankful beyond words that I wake up every day in the United States of America. I give thanks to all of the veterans who have provided the freedom that has made my wonderful life possible. I'd especially like to thank our troops around the world who can't be with their family and friends today. Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers.

Wishing all of you a safe, happy and memorable Thanksgiving.....

kw

The Joys of Flying - A Case Study

Preparing for my flight from Denver to Baltimore last Friday, I went through my normal routine of checking-in online 24 hours beforehand. I was disappointed to see that only middle seats were available. Actually, this isn't quite true. In yet another attempt by the airlines to gouge passengers, there were several middle and aisle seats available, if you were willing to pay a $56 upgrade fee. Of course, this got my blood pressure up. But already feeling beaten down by my recent flights, I reluctantly reserved the "free" middle seat. I figured with my luck, even if I paid the upgrade fee, there would be a family of squatters camping out in my "premium" window or aisle seat. And we all know how that's been turning out for me.

Flight day......

As I wander into Denver International Airport, I make my way up to the United Airlines "counter" to check my bag. I soon discover that the counter is actually more of a self-serve kiosk. I could tell that half of the customers were thoroughly confused as the poked at the touch screen as if were the Pillsbury Doughboy. Behind the counter, there were several United employees. Their job was to drift from station-to-station to assist people as needed. It seems to me that things could be handled way more efficiently if the employees were doing the actual baggage check in the first place. But, from what I assume is an attempt for the airline to save a few bucks, we're left to do it ourselves.

And speaking of checked bags, there's also the issue of charging for this "service". In United's case, it's $25 per checked item (under 40 pounds). Since my suitcase itself weighs about 10 pounds, this only leaves my 30 pounds for a weeks' worth of clothes and a winter coat. If I go over the 40 pound limit, I will be forced to pay another fee. Obviously, all of this has the potential to tack on a substantial sum of money for a vacationing family. As a result, people opt-out of checking their bags and carry them onto the plane to avoid paying any fees. More on this later.....

As I make my way into the main part of the terminal, two airport employees direct me to the screening area where "the line is much shorter". I head over to the security line which is growing as it snakes back and forth. If this is the "shorter line", I'd hate to see the other one! We are poked and prodded through the line like clueless cattle by the various TSA agents. I accept that the security screenings are a way of life in a post-9/11 world. However, it irritates me knowing that 99.9999% of all passengers are harmless and totally undeserving of the screenings, pat-downs and gropings.

After about twenty minutes, I finally make it to the point where you take off your shoes, belt, watch, dental fillings or any else that might set the metal detectors off. I then step into the body scanner where my image is sent to an unknown TSA screener in an undisclosed location. I can't help but feel like a Peeping Tom victim every time I go through this process.

Somewhat relieved, I make it through without setting off any bells or whistles. I gather up my belongings and head to the tram that will take me to the Gate B of Denver's large airport. The tram is full of anxious passengers. Every time the underground train stops and starts, people practically falls on top of  one another.

As I make it to the B Concourse, I find a place to sit. Although the flight isn't scheduled to leave for another hour, people have already begun to stand in line at the various boarding stations. Scanning the crowd, I see a very familiar face at the front in boarding group A. It's none other that Oriole legend, Cal Ripken Jr. My mind drifts as I imagine getting a seat next to the Ironman and talking Orioles baseball all the back to Baltimore. But reality soon kicks me in the head as I realize that Cal is in the First Class section while I'll be huddled with the rest of the cattle back in the coach section. Oh well, sometimes it's fun to dream....

I eventually board the plane, hoping that my neighbors for the next few hours will be anorexic runway models. I don't mean to be insensitive, but the skinnier these people are, the more room there is for my fat ass in the middle seat. As I approach my seat, I see that there is no one else in the row yet. I sit there and watch the other passengers struggle to fit their oversized luggage into the overhead bins. When it becomes clear that some of these bags won't physically fit, a flight attendant announces, "Folks, we'd like to leave on schedule. If your bag won't fit into the overhead bin, we will check it for you at no charge."

WTF?

So, people like me, who play by the rules, get stuck paying $25 to check our bag. But the people who clearly violate the size limit of the carry-on rules get to check their bags for free? What is wrong with this picture??

As I feel my blood pressure rising again, I am comforted when a young lady. who happens to be the size of an Olympic gymnast, interrupts my mini-stroke and asks,"Excuse me, can I squeeze by you? I've got the window seat."

Shortly afterward, a surprisingly thin guy sits in the aisle seat to my right. I finally relax, knowing that I won't be crushed into numbness on the flight home. God bless skinny people!

As my flight progresses, I kill time by digging into John Grisham's latest book. Before I know it, we are descending into BWI. The gymnast next to me is sound asleep. The flight attendant wakes her to tell her that she needs to return her seat to the upright position. Here's something that I never quite understood. Since we're already pinned in our seats like veal, why would the airlines even allow seats to recline? Through the years, I have spilled multiple airline cocktails because some asshole in front of me decided to aggressively recline his seat.

Anyway, we eventually land and make our way to the baggage claim area. As I see my brand-new bag coming around on the carousel, I notice a large scuff mark on the side. Did the plane run it over on the way to the gate? I guess you have to pay an extra $25 if you don't want your bag f*cked up?

If you've ever flown before, you can probably relate to a lot of these things. If not, just be prepared. Isn't flying just grand??

kw

A Developing Flight Pattern

Well, it was deja vu all over again for me, folks. I was faced with a recurring dilemma on my flight to Denver this past Sunday. I recently told you my story about the flight back from Florida*. Of course, that flight had a happy ending.

Here's the latest story from the friendly skies.....

Going through my usual pre-flight ritual, I checked in online 24 hours in advance. My seat number was 37A, which is a window seat. Although I prepare the aisle seat, a window seat is perfectly acceptable. As long as I don't get the dreaded middle seat, I'm good to go.

On Sunday, I head to airport. The flight is totally full. In fact, it's overbooked. How do airlines get away with this? If you have 300 seats, you should only be allowed to sell 300 tickets. But anyway, I eventually board the plane and make my way to the back of the large plane. As I approach the mid-30 rows, I see one empty window seat on the right. Using deductive reasoning, I conclude that this has to be my seat. I squeeze past the guy who's already sitting in the middle seat and shoe-horn my ass into the small window seat. I strike up a conversation with the guy next to me. He tells me that his wife and small child are in the row in front of us. His wife is in the middle seat with a young child that I would estimate to be about a year and a half old. In the window seat next to the mother, sits the couple's three year toddler.

The guy "apologizes in advance" for any commotion that the kids will cause during the 4-hour flight to Denver. This couldn't be good. In a lame bribe attempt, he offers to swap his middle seat with the guy in the aisle seat in front of us. But we all knew that wasn't going to happen. Given the choice of a middle seat and a screaming kid, I'll take the screaming kid every time.

Well, before long, a young woman in her mid-20's stops at our row and, in a not so friendly tone, says, "You're in my seat."

I find it odd that she looked at me when she said it. So, I reply, "Sorry, I think you might be mistaken. I have 37A"

And then she replies, "Well, you're sitting in 38A. That's my seat."

I realize that I made the mistake, so I apologize to girl and start to move out into the aisle.Then, I realize that the three-year old is sitting in my seat. Now, what?

So, I look at the parents and say, "Oops. How are we going to work this out?"

The mother tells me that the child is frightened and doesn't want to sit next to a stranger.. The father then utters what I've been dreading. He asks, "Would you mind letting my daughter have your seat? You can have her seat in the next row."

Almost afraid to ask, I say, "What is your daughter's seat number?"

He says, "36B."

Now, 36B might be a desirable bra size, but when it comes to airplane seats, it's anything but desirable! I instinctively give the guy my best "are you kidding me" look. My attention is then directly to the guy's daughter who is now clinging to her mother in an Oscar award winning kind of way. As the little girl starts to whine, another passenger says, "Aw, she's afraid that she's gonna have to move away from her mother." Everyone turned their heads to see what was going on. I felt like the passengers were conspiring against me. Can you believe this bullshit?

So, just like my trip from Florida last month, I had no choice. If I make the child get out of my seat, I will ironically look like the anti-Christ. I have no recourse except to say, "Fine, you're daughter can stay where she's at. I'll squeeze in between these two guys." I reluctantly squeeze into the row in front of the mother/daughter and take the dreaded middle seat.

As the child realized that her Oscar winning performance had paid off, she instantly began to laugh and play like she was going to Disney World. As the flight was in process, the little girl would occasionally let out a loud, ear-piercing scream. Napping passengers would jump every time she screamed. To add to the commotion, the girl began to fight with her younger sister. I put my ear-buds in and cranked up my I-pod to full blast to try and drown them out.

I've talked to some other people about what I've experienced. Some of them have told me that they won't switch seats regardless of the situation. I can see their point. After all, they check in at the appropriate time to secure a desirable a seat. Why should someone be able to set you up by planting their kid in your seat? It's a below-the-belt tactic, if you ask me. If families want to sit together, airlines will often allow an early check-in for a small fee. Ironically, it's often the guy that pays the early check-in fee who gets forced out of his seat.

I'm really starting to hate flying.......

kw

* http://kensmouthpiece.blogspot.com/2013/10/the-party-flight-from-panama-city.html

Can Obamacare Work Itself Out?

The Obamacare roll-out is well into it's second month and the problems continue. The millions of cancelled health insurance plans has the President fumbling to save face with the American people. The President, this week, actually backtracked a bit and has proposed extending the individual insurance market for one year. Essentially, this would allow people to actually keep their existing plan for another year. This is really nice of him considering that's what he promised in the first place.

But should any of this come as a big surprise? After all, the Affordable Care Act was
 rushed through Congress and sold to us on a lie. If you remember, we were told that it was not a tax. However, the main focus by opponents of the bill, was whether or not it was actually constitutional. When it eventually made it's way to the Supreme Court, to the Republican's dismay, it was deemed to be constitutional. Why? Because it was TAX!!  So, Obamacare staggered on......

And as if that wasn't hard enough to absorb, the President told us time after time that if you like your plan, you can keep it. To millions of Americans, that turned out to be another lie. Are you sensing a pattern here?

Somewhat related, we were also told that 30 million of currently uninsured individuals would be covered under Obamacare. Many of these folks would receive free medical services and Obama promised that it "wouldn't add a dime to our deficit". Was this also a lie? Technically, no. You see, as people are kicked off of their current plans and forced into the Obamacare exchanges, they'll likely pay higher rates for coverage that they don't really need. The idea being that the overcharge would subsidize the free services. In other words, the people who could afford to pay for insurance would cover the people who could not afford it. So, per se, it would not add to the deficit. But it would likely add to cost of many of our insurance plans.

But while all of this was being digested, something unexpected happened......

As people started to get cancellation letters from their insurance companies, they got a little upset. As a result, they contacted their representatives and voiced their outrage. Since many Congressional Democrats carried the President's water on the Obamacare campaign, they had some serious explaining to do. 

In a strange turn of events, Obama is now feeling pressure by members of his own party to somehow put a positive spin on this. Obama is between a rock and a hard place right now. His approval rating is at an all-time low and the midterm elections are right around the corner. Today, Senate Democrats outnumber Republicans 53-45 (2 Senators are Independent). Since there are over 30 seats up for re-election, all of this could have a major impact in 2014.

Yesterday, a house bill was passed that would not only allow insurers to offer policies on the individual market, but they would also be allowed to sell policies to new customers. The bill, sponsored by Republican Fred Upton of Michigan, was passed 261-157 with 39 Democrats voting in favor. This is an indication that at least some Democrats are prepared to jump ship on Obama to save their own asses back home. However, it is assumed that if the bill somehow makes it through the Senate and onto to the President's desk, Obama will veto it.*

Here's the thing with politics.... Everyone has their reasons for who or what they believe in. However, when you start hitting people in the wallet, they take it personal. And more precisely, when people are negatively impacted by a lie(s), especially in the pocket book, it becomes a major challenge to win back their trust and confidence. That will be Obama's biggest hurdle in the upcoming months. He will have to convince Americans that what we've experienced in the initial weeks are only minor "bugs" that will eventually work themselves out. At this point, it appears that it will be a hard sell....

In spite of everything I've mention above, here is my biggest problem. The President claimed that he wasn't aware of the problems leading up to the website debacle. This seems hard for me to believe considering that this is his signature piece of legislation. How could he have not been informed of any potential problems? Additional, when he continuously promised that everyone would be able to keep their current insurance plan, did he simply not know that millions of people would be dropped? If so, in hindsight, it seems irresponsible that he would push a bill that he didn't even understand. If he did know about all of this, then there's no other explanation other than he lied. If that's the case, he didn't think people would react when they got the cancellation letters from their insurance companies?

Am I the only one who thinks that Obamacare was rolled out after the 2012 elections for a reason?

I read the news reports (from both liberal and conservative sources) and try to make sense out of all of it. I certainly don't claim to fully understand it. But, from what I've seen since it's roll-out, it appears that the people who gave us Obamacare don't quite understand it either.....

kw

*http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2013/11/15/House-Passes-Upton-Fix-for-ObamaCare

Pit Bulls - Dangerous or Unfairly Biased?

People have various opinions of dog breeds, especially of the pit bull. The media can certainly influence these opinions. Whenever there's a brutal dog attack, it seems like we can almost guess that the reporter will reveal that there was a pit bull involved.  However, when I was a kid, the German Shepherd was the dog that intimidated us the most. A decade later, the Doberman and Rottweiler were competing for the title.

But in recent years, the pit bull has surpassed the notoriety of all the other breeds. We have all heard the  stories where a pit bull attacked without provocation. In the worst cases, the attack resulted in a fatality. Just last week, a 56-year-old Baltimore woman was mauled to death by her own pit bull. This particular dog had also attacked the woman twice in the past. Also last week, a woman in Kernersville, NC was killed by her two pit bulls. Last month, a 5-year-old was mauled to death by a neighbor's pit bull in Baker City, OR. And in September, two toddlers were killed by pit bulls in separate incidents, one in Colten, CA and the other in Gilbert, AZ.

And just this morning, I was reading an article about a woman in Wilton, CN who had one of her arms ripped off by her sons' pit bull.*

I have personally witnessed the aftermath of a pit bull attack. The daughter of my sister's friend was savagely attacked by a neighbor's pit bull when she was about five old years old. The dog literally ripped the child's face off. She has had many reconstructive surgeries through the years to repair the massive facial damage.

Quite frankly, when I saw the little girl and learned of her story, I instinctively developed a hatred for pit bulls. The terror that the young child experienced was unfathomable. My thought was that the volatility of a pit bull was no different than leaving a loaded gun laying around. I also questioned why anyone would want to own such an unpredictable animal, especially where children were present.

However, as years went by, I personally encountered several of these dogs, some of which were owned by close friends. My experience in these cases were much different. Although I was initially intimidated, I eventually found these pit bulls to be playful, almost like overgrown puppies. I started to question whether I unfairly stereotyped the breed.

The fact of the matter is that any dog, assuming it has teeth, can bite. Case in point, I ran into a mailman last week who had recently been bitten by a dog. Curious about the large bandage on his hand, I asked what kind of dog bit him. It was a Chihuahua.

During my lifetime, I have been bitten by three dogs. The first time was by a German Shepherd when I was about twelve years old. When I had reached over to pet the Shepherd while he was eating, he instinctively deposited his fang teeth into my right hand. Although I was quite surprised that the usually mild-mannered dog snapped at me, I quickly learned that you don't mess with a dog while he's eating. A short time later, I was bitten on the leg by another friend's dog as we were running through his house. This one happened to be a small German Schnauzer. And the third time came courtesy of my aunt's Chihuahua, who I was convinced had a serious anger management issue.

Fortunately, for me, all of my dog bite experiences were minor and required no medical attention. Of course, there's quite a difference between a dog bite and a dog attack. I looked up some random statistics on all of this and here's what I found:

• Children, especially boys between 5-9, are the most likely targets of dog bites
• Dog bites rank second in annual childhood emergency room visits. (Baseball/softball injuries rank #1)
• There are approximately 885,000 reported bites a year. Roughly 20% of these bites require medical attention
• Over 16,000 dog bites are work related. Mail carriers account for roughly 6000 of these bites
• The number of fatalities due to dog attacks is relatively low. However, the number is on on the rise. During the 1980's and 1990's, the average death rate due to dog attacks was 17. In the past six years, the annual rate has nearly doubled to 31 
• According to the American Humane Society, 92% of fatal dog bites involve male dogs, 94% of which are not neutered
• Somewhat surprising, 25% of dog attacks involve chained dogs
• Since 2006, pit bulls have accounted for the most fatal attacks by breed

And while the pit bull seems to be synonymous with today's dog attacks, according to studies conducted by the CDC**, there is no scientific proof that they are human aggressive or inherently vicious. Additionally, they are not the breed that bites the most. For instance, recent records have shown that the Chow is more likely to bite than a pit bull. And the German Shepherd is five times more likely to cause bite trauma than the notorious pit bull.*** I owned a German Shepherd and never felt the least bit intimidated by him, but you never know. And let's face it, the reason that police use German Shepherds isn't only because they're good-looking and smart. They use them because they're bad-ass! While the pit bull might be viewed as a relentless street-fighter, one could make the argument that the German Shepherd is the highly skilled MMA fighter. Both can be dangerous in their own way.....

The pit bull will likely remain the "poster child" of dangerous breeds. And we can't deny that it's, at least a somewhat, deserved reputation. However, we also can't ignore that fact that many other breeds are capable of attacking or, in the worst cases, killing. One of the keys, in my opinion, is responsible ownership. As a gun owner, you need to take precautions. The same should hold true in the case of dogs.......

kw

* http://www.ctpost.com/news/article/Pit-bull-bites-off-owner-s-arms-4976857.php
**http://mabbr.org/pit-bull-ownership/the-truth-about-pit-bulls/
*** http://www.thedogpress.com/Columns/Dog-BiteStatisics-09_Jade.asp

The Deception of Handicapped Parking

Have you ever paid close attention to the people who park in the handicapped parking spaces? Of course, there are some folks who are legitimately deserving of these spots. But I'd be willing to bet that the majority of these people are about as "handicapped" as Miley Cyrus during a twerking competition.

I recently saw a guy pull into a handicapped spot in front of Macy's. He jumped out of his truck and sprinted across the parking lot and into the store. That's right, he sprinted like Bruce freggin' Jenner! I was going to report the guy to one of the teenage mall cops. But as I walked past the guy's truck, I was shocked to see that he actually had handicapped tags. Legal or not, how does a guy who runs a four-minute mile have the conscience to park in a handicapped zone?

And sometimes, instead of the traditional handicapped license plates, people will use those tags that hang from the rear view mirror. The advantage is that they can easily move these tags to different vehicles. And as a result, these portable tags also make it easier to abuse the whole handicapped parking situation. For instance, I've seen people who looked like Olympic athletes park in handicapped spots. And, appearing to defy logic, they have one of those familiar tags hanging from the mirror. When I see these inconsiderate assholes effortlessly strolling across the parking lot, I instinctively get the urge to go all "Tonya Harding" on them. But  because there are laws against this type of thing, I've never actually do it. But I have to assume that nothing would turn an abused handicapped tag into a legitimate tag quicker than a brisk thump to the knee cap.

There is a hefty fine if you park in a handicapped spot without proper tags. But I think that the fine should be double or triple if you have the tags and then proceed to run across the parking lot! In my opinion, this is just another case of entitlement fraud.

So, if you happen to be one of these thoughtless morons who makes it a habit to abuse handicapped parking, please do us all a favor... the next time you get out of your vehicle, at least humor us and walk with a limp. It's the least you can do!

kw

More Offensive NFL Teams

The controversy regarding the Redskins "offensive" name is still alive and well. But as I was thinking about it tonight, I realized that people might have it all wrong. If any team should be offensive to Indians, shouldn't it be the Cowboys? I mean, who was giving the Indians the most grief in the old westerns? It wasn't a burgundy and gold football team. It was the freggin' cowboys! And when we were kids, we didn't play football and Indians. No, indeed. We played Cowboys and Indians. So, instead of the Oneida Indian Nation putting pressure on Dan Snyder, maybe then should head to Dallas and have a talk with Jerry Jones.

Aside from the Redskins controversy, I also thought about how some of the other teams could be deemed offensive. For instance, what about the Giants? Couldn't their cockiness be considered just a bit insensitive to short people? Didn't they already suffer enough emotional abuse from Randy Newman?

And what about the Saints? Should the Vatican take offense? After all, this was the "saintly" team who put out bounties on opposing players. That sure doesn't very saint-like to me. I think the Pope should head to New Orleans and have a sit-down with the team.

Let's look at the St. Louis Rams. I'm sure there's a group of pissed-off mountain goats out there somewhere who don't want their name associated with a big city. By the way, has anyone ever seen a ram in St. Louis?

Why does Buffalo get away with calling their team the Bills? There's probably at least one guy named Bill who doesn't take too kindly to Buffalo using his name. He should petition the team to change their name to the Steves, Johns, Joes or Bobs.

The San Francisco 49ers.....why not give some love to a few of the other numbers? 

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers..... I wonder how those Somali pirates feel about this?

The Green Bay Packers? I'm not going to touch this one.

And regarding the Jaguars, there's probably a group of promiscuous, old women who have a problem with the name. Oops, sorry, I was thinking about cougars. Nevermind....

kw